Fatback Media

Now that Paula Abdul is out of the picture for the hit Fox showAmerican Idol, the show is looking for a judge that can be fun and entertaining. Or at least a temporary guest judge. Just like Simon is in no position to judge American talent because he is a Brit and Paula was the only true talent on the show who was in a position to judge  talent, Fox did the next best thing and got the most British person on the face of the earth to guest judge the show. Victoria Beckham.

I have got nothing against Victoria and the days of calling her a robot is sooo yesteryear. I would totally do her. But I am shallow like that. So in between tea breaks and crumpets with Simon she will attempt to tell people they are or are not full of talent and deserve to sell millions of records and perform in some of the biggest arenas in the world. If I were in the UK, I would call bollocks. Right guv’na?

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Victoria Beckham has looked hot for years. She isn’t one of these chicks like Pamela Anderson who has to have ENORMOUS boobs just to look somewhat good.  She had surgery a grand total of 3 times. Once for regular implants, then a bigger but and now breast reduction. She is now down to a squeezable 34B.

I really like big boobs I truly do but when there is boobs that is soft and can fit in your hands, not only does it make my hands look bigger in comparison but they are soft and mailable and fun to play with. So Victoria, who I am sure got the reduction for the sexual preferences of David Beckham, should head over my way and let me test them out. A squeeze there, a nipple tweak there. You know, just so I know they are comfortable. If you like my place you can hang for the weekend. You know while David is off doing all that underwear stuff. We can talk about how men never have time for their women. Oh men. What are you gonna do? Can’t live with them, can’t live without them. Yes, a couple of sassy girlfriends we will be. After the boob inspection of course.

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Linsk that are a D-cup and still growing

Will Smith and his tranny wife Jada Pinkett Smith are gettin’ freaky- IDLYITW

Killing puppies is not cute- Geno’s World

Is Britney Spears getting married again? – popbytes

Sanjaya is a stright gay guy- Seriously? OMG! WTF?

How to be an attention whore for dummies- Allie Is Wired

Tori Spelling still looks weird in a bikini- Drunken Stepfather

Lindsay Lohan is such a loser she got dumped by a chick she wasn’t even going out with- yeeeah

Megan Fox shows off her fine little tush- IDLYITW

Lauren Conrad likes being flat- notorious news

Amy Winehouse’s parents are just now realizing that drugs and alcohol might kill Amy- Holy Moly

Fergie is a cover girl- Amy Grindhouse 

J.Lo has a boring career- I Don’t Want Your Life

Most people on Thanksgiving stay indoors with family and stuff themselves with turkey. This Thanksgiving TomKat did nothing of the sort. Instead they went out to the Big Apple Circus in NYC with the Beckhams. Afterwards they took a tour of central park, like they have never been there before, and took a horse and carriage ride through the property.

It must be nice to be as rich as TomKat and the Beckhams. While I was inside eating Wal-Mart turkey and smoking cigarettes they were taking a fucking horse carriage ride in NYC. This isn’t the time of year for envy though. Instead I will feel sorry for Jada Pikett Smith. Some people think she is a talented actress, but all I see in a post op transexual. Seriously, I bet Samantha Ronson hit on her until Will Smith walked over and shoved his tongue down her throat complete with adam’s apple. OK I am gonna go throw up now.

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