Simon Cowell is best known in the U.S as a judge on Fox’s hit show American Idol. But what a lot of people don’t know is that he has a show in the U.K. called X-Factor. Lame. Britney Spears took her worldwide lip synching tour to the U.K. where she performed on the show. Simon Cowell was “blown away.” Hello? Britney is lip synching. Of course you were blown away.

Simon Cowell told Ryan Seacrest’s KIIS_FM, ” To be fair- and this may be a bit egotistical- I think she was in awe of me. It was like she was just staring at me. At the end of it, I just said ‘ Look- touch me- I’m human!’ And I think that broke the ice.” Of course she was staring at you Simon she was all drugged up on psych meds that her daddy makes her take. And don’t try to pass yourself off as human Simon. We all know you are one of those evil demons the scientologists blame the problems of the world on.

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