Sandra Bullock is all over the tabloids these days and rightfully so. She isn’t some random hotty who is famous for being famous. She actually worked for her fame. Hell, the bitch won an Oscar so when people say her acting is sub-par (and usually it is) she will always have that Oscar to prove she is worthy.

But this time it isn’t her acting skills or her dubious husband that is grabbing her headlines. She just adopted a baby boy from New Orleans named Louis. She actually got custody of the kid in January but made Jesse and his kids swear to secrecy until she was ready to tell the public. I think this is awesome and VERY unexpected. Bitch has gotta be on top of the world.

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Sandra Bullock, for some odd reason, is in custody of Jesse James’ kids. If this guy were still in rehab then I would understand but I am not sure why Sandra feels the need to take care of the little ones when it is Jesse James that spawned them. In the meantime another mistress has came out and said that Jesse James said he loved her.

Also, Jesse James’ little reality show, whatever the fuck it is called, got cancelled since Jesse is such an immoral person. Basically, Jesse hit rock bottom and he isn’t gonna crawl out of the gutter anytime soon. Of course, if he really wants to rehabilitate his image, he can gain about 50 lbs. and then go on Celebrity Fit Club.That is how most douchebags turn shit around.

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According to sources who have seen Sandra Bullocks prenuptual agreement, Sandra doesn’t have to pay Jesse a dime during the divorce because there was a clause in it saying that he gets nothing if they divorce due to infidelity. This is shit coming from RadarOnline so the source is about as credible as Michael Lohan, but it’s out there.

Also, James left the rehab center he was staying at to be treated for sexual adddiction in Tucson, Arizona because it is now clear that Sandra will not take him back. The best payback sandra could get is to leave his ass in the gutter and then get a giant backpiece tattoo making him jealous as fuck. Yes, that is a good strategy.

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According to multiple sources, Sandra Bullock is hiring a divorce lawyer as is Jesse James. I would usually root for Jesse in this situation because he would be taking on the role as gold digger in this case but since he has no problem boning a white supremacist, I hope his dick falls off.

Good news is, Sandra Bullock is about to be back on the market. I doubt I will hit on her though cause she doesn’t really go to clubs or have any type of fun by any measure. She will probably go out on the town and have to wait behind the velvet ropes like that chick in Knocked Up did cause she is “old as fuck”.

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Jesse James is a hardass from a show on Discovery channel called Monster Garage.He is big into cars,motorcycles and tattoos which makes you wonder why the fuck he would marry a goody goody like Sandra Bullock. Well, it makes sense really, you take her money and bang hotties behind her back.

This is a perfect formula but it has backfired in Jesse James’ face. He was caught cheating with a heavily tattooed and very atractive model named Michelle “Bombshell” McGhee. She looks like a LOT more fun to hang out with than Sandra Bullock would ever be. Since this news has leaked, Sandra cancelled a London premiere of her movie and Jesse’s camp refuses to return phone calls.

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Sandra Bullock won for Best Actress In A Leading Role at The Oscars last night and I think she was well deserving. I haven’t seen The Blind Side yet but I remember seeing the trailer forever ago and thought it would be a good movie. She was thrilled to win the award but said that she wanted to “nap”.

When Sandra Bullock says “nap” she really means sneak away with me to a little cottage in Cabo and have wild sex for a week or so. I know the press didn’t pick up on it but me and her know what the “nap” code means. And that is all that is really important. I was thinking of a couple of kinky things I could do with the Oscars trophy but my last girlfriend ditched me for a guy named Oscar so those thoughts immediately left my head.

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I have a love/hate relationship with celebrities. I love it when they do nude scenes, I hate it when they do nude scenes and don’t show anything. Kind of like Jennifer Aniston in The Break Up. You saw her ass but it was so grainy it was almost impossible to jack off to. Luckily the leaked nipple shots of her finally got me off.

Now Sandra is following in Aniston’s footsteps by doing a nude scene, where she claims she was totally naked, but doesn’t show anything in the new movie The Proposal. She says,” Shooting it was odd. There are things stuck to areas that generally you don’t have things [stuck to]. I mean, you have things covering [your body], but not stuck to it. And then they got unstuck, and oddly we didn’t care because we were so tired.”

Notice how she uses the word “odd” a lot. I guess she looks odd naked. And they things that are stuck to her that she is complaining about I am guessing are nipple pasties. Things strippers where for some God awful reason. So basically Sandra Bullock isn’t comfortable being naked around just a handful of people, let alone millions. What a fucking prude. If I ever see her, I am going to give her the biggest titty twister I have ever given anyone, and I give pretty mean titty twisters.

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Links that only put on clothes when someone is at the door

Cameron Diaz is a natural beauty- IDLYITW

Lauren Conrad is ready for life after the d-list- Geno’s World

A Britney Spears spoof- Chisme Time

Adam Lmabert steps out with his boyfriend- popbytes

Heidi and Spencer officially quit I’m A Celebrity…Get Me Out Of Here- Seriously? OMG! WTF?

Beyonce Knowles is riding a bike- Celeb News Wire

Tank Girl got a DUI- IDLYITW

In vitro cat fighting- notorious news

They’re not kissing, they’re snogging- Holy Moly

Kristin Cavallari still has one of the best asses in Hollywood- I Don’t Want Your Life

Megan Fox is on the cover of GQ- Amy Grindhouse

Miley Cyrus’ little sister is drinking red bull- Allie Is Wired

Look out! Naked chick on a motorcycle- Attu World