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Pete Wentz is the center of attention these days. Or at least it seems that way since Ashlee is almost nowhere to be found.  When you search Ashlee Simpson on paparazzi websites all you get is pictures of Pete Wentz getting his hair colored,getting tattoos and buying skinny jeans. And don’t forget about the guyliner. Yea the guyliner. It seems that Ashlee has been stuck in the house for weeks while Pete goes out and about. It is not like he is out bringing home the bacon either. His band The Fall Out Boyshaven’t released a cd in some time.

The only person from the Simpson camp that had anything to say isn’t even in the united states. Bitch is in Australia. She said, ” This is not true. Everything is fine in their world.” Well you heard it. The chick in Australia says things are all good in Hollywood. I don’t see what the big deal is. I go out and party on a regular basis and leave my wife home to cook and clean. We are really happy. Except when she doesn’t have my cigars and slippers ready when I get home. Then all hell breaks loose. Why can’t women get it through their head that when they don’t make their husbands happy they get the hand. It’s easy, no slippers=the hand.No cigars=the hand. No sports section=the hand. I should really write a How to keep your man happy handbook. It is a lot less painful.

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Links that can cook a mean chicken dinner

Rihanna got some gun tattoos- IDLYITW

Audrina Patridge is in Australia- IBBB

David Beckham is playing football, properly pronounced “soccer” – yeeeah

Madonna is adopting another baby- Holy Moly

Britney Spears is moving to New Jersey…for now- Allie Is Wired

Anna Faris has bigger boobs in Arena- Drunken Stepfather

J-Love in Mexico part 2- IDLYITW

Sean Penn and Natalie Portman take themselves WAY to seriously- Celeb News Wire

Zac Efron Doesn’t fuck Vanessa Anne Hudgens. Vanessa Anne Hudgens fucks Zac efron.- I Don’t Want Your Life

Some fugly chick from CSI is divorcing her husband- Celebrity Dirty Laundry

Who doesn’t belong with the others? – Seriously? OMG! WTF?

Cute college girl of the day- College Humor

Where The Wild Things Are trailer- popbytes

Lindsay lohan is a giant failure!- notorious news

Halle Berry gives Jay Leno a smell test- Geno’s World

It lookmpson,s like the EW is just as desperate as Ashlee Simpson. Since their ratings are basically in the toilet they are reinstating Melrose Place. Seeing as that show hasn’t been around for almost 10 years and the most famous person on it was Heather Locklier, I doubt this will take of. To try to drum up publicity they will be casting Ashlee Simpson as one of the main characters. She will be playing a girl named Violet which according to Ew.com is a naive girl but in reality she is a sex kitten. Hot.

Now that she is on the cast, people are speculating on whether or not Pete Wentz will have a cameo. I never thought I would see the day that someone was a bigger attention whore than Ashlee Simpson but rumors are already circulating about when Pete Wentz will make a cameo. I am guessing week two. It is also pretty obvious that Pete likes the camera more than Ashlee when you search Ashlee Simpson in the Splash photos archive and the first 3 pages are pictures of Pete Wentz. My predictions? A lot of hot bikini pictures of Simpson on the show and maybe even a sexy lingerie seduction with another male co star. I can dream can’t I?

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I have to hand it to Pete Wentz. I figured that he was just another douche bag that liked to keep his sex life private. Then he goes on Howard Stern and talks about how Ashlee Simpson likes to take it up the ass! What a guy. This is almost as cool as the pics of Zac Efron and Vanessa Anne Hudgens shopping in a porn shop. Now Wentz is talking about how he tried Ashlee Simpson’s breast milk. Who wouldn’t?

He describes the taste as “soury” and “weird.” OK so maybe Pete doesn’t like Ashlee’s breast milk. But I still might. Let be get ahold of those titties and I will give you my culinary opinion. My pallet is rather refined. Though maybe not so much for breast milk, but if it is coming out of Ashlee Simpson’s body, it has to taste good. In the upcoming weeks Ashlee will describe how Pete Wentz’s semen tastes and Jessica Simpson will tell how good it feels to be a virgin.

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Christmas Eve links

The Hills season finale- IBBB

Amy Winehouse dancing topless- Drunken Stepfather

Lindsay Lohan has a new sister- Allie Is Wired

Jodie Marsh. I can’t get enough of her- d-listed

Amy Winehouse, not dancing topless- The Bastardly

Cute college girl of the day- College Humor

Zac Efron is scared of the paparazzi- Geno’s World

The grossest Christmas pic you will see all year- I Don’t Want Your Life

Tina Fey and Alec Baldwin hate each other. How funny, I hate them too! -yeeeah