Peek-a-boo! Oh also, your nipple is out.

Oh man, new Marisa Miller nudes have just made my day. I remember being a wee lad of 24 and discovering Perfect 10 in teh intarnets and making Marisa Miller the screensaver in my spankbank. She’s still got it folks and she’s old as shit, like, 32 or something. Which is like a million in model years, but just right in your-mom years. (ed. note; I would hit them both -call me!).

Anyway. Here’s Marisa Miller naked in Spain, or naked in LA but displayed in a Spanish magazine. Or being photographed by a dude with a Spanish accent. Or something.Whatever.  Boobs!

Deposit into spankbank, complete.

Brooklyn Decker is naked and artsy. So wear a beret and smoke  Gauloises after you wank into your sock. Abientot!

Does anyone have a moist towelette?

Man, if there’s one thing I love it’s naked women. Especially naked British women with huge natural boobs and a landing stripped vajajay. So, can anyone tell me WTF happened here? I mean, I still have a boner, but I have an urge to sniff Pine-Sol and that makes me confused. Fucking photographers. Leave to an “artist” to fuck up and spank-bankable naked women in a photoshoot. This kind of reminds me of that time your mom went crazy got naked and tried to kill me. Except that was my mom. Ok, boner is officially gone. I need a tissue.

Can I borrow some sugar?

Okay, so I’ve been holding on to most of these for while because a certain Men’s Magazine get’s their crotchless panties all in a wad when you post their pictures, even though is obviously fair use and it actually drives sales. But I digress. Kim Kardashian is nude. YOU HEAR THAT GOOGLE? These pics are from the photo shoot Kim did a while back for the men’s magazine in question. Some made into to glossy stapled glory and some (read: the ones without nipples) made it into the “outtake” pile. Which is just another way of saying, ‘how can we squeeze the last drop of rights management out of these once Kim starts to lose her relevance?’

But, I being a pervy blogger professional journalist, like to give credit where credit is due. First off you can thank the folks who emblazoned these pics with the little bunny for the photography. I’d also like to thank Kim Kardashian for having huge tits and wanting to show them off like a famemongering whore. And lastly, I’d like to thank Kim’s dad for setting a murderer free. God Bless America. And Twins!

The nipple ratio is so high I had to put the pic after the jump…enjoy. Feel free to not sue me.

I'm civic minded, y'all!

Look at me I’m Amber Heard! I’m an actress y’all and I care about political stuff, too! And because I’m famous, my opinion counts more that yours! HAHAHAHAHA!

STFU. If there’s anything worse than a protester, it’s actor who’s a protestor. It’s like we should all stop what we’re doing and listen to actors like Sean Penn, who took time out of his busy day being smug and inordinately rich, to let us know that we should fucking care about this important cause, about which, he could give exactly two shits.

Hi, I’m Sean Penn and I’m bored as fuck with my life of riches and having sex with Robin Wright, so please look at me at this rally for gay atheist Korean shop keepers in the barrio who can’t pay their rent because of the MAN.”

But I digress. This is Amber Heard at a Prop 8 rally. Granted, the cause is worthwhile, but seriously, what is she doing here looking all beautiful with her sensuous red lips and heaving natural breasts and standing seductively close to the hot tattoo lady with the nice teeth? [OMG, they might kiss!] NO ON PROP 8! NO ON PROP 8! I love you Amber! Call me.

If you're blue, and you don't know where to go to...

Kelly Brook nude with photoshop in all the wrong places… Click here for the full Kelly Brook Nude photoshoot. PUTTIN’ ONNA RITZ!

Here’s a NSFW from the archives: Click here for more Ashley Green Nude nakedness. That is all.

"please to bring vodka, tovarisch..."

Get your bunkers filled with twinkies and lite beer, comrades. The Cold war = on like donkey kong!

This is accused spy Anna Chapman giving the Russian salute. Apparently all Russian chicks are exactly like you think  they are:

1. They’re hot
2. They have sexy accents
3. They fucking hate everything about you
4. They’re all spies
5. They love vodka sex

Recently arrested and still alleged Russian spy, Anna Chapman’s ex-husband (read: mark) is pissed that he’s not getting that anymore doing his patriotic duty and releasing nude photos information vital to the investigation. Let’s go down to Gorky Park and listen to the winds of change with NOTW:

For the first time Alex Chapman opens the full classified file – including compromising snaps – on the beauty arrested as a Moscow agent in the US.

He tells how James Bond-loving temptress Anna had a 007-style mile high romp on a plane from London to the Russian capital as their passion reached its height.

And how the 28-year-old femme fatale loved to wear nipple clamps and wield a WHIP like an interrogator as they were Ivan it off.

“I found her Russian accent such a turn-on,” says Alex, 30, who had no idea she was honing her sexy spying skills on him. “She was the most beautiful person I had ever met, with an extraordinary body, and I was infatuated with her.

But their relationship was to be built on secrets and lies.

Kinda like the secrets and lies MI5 and MI6 were duped with as Russians infiltrated your agencies for 40 years! Zing! Aw..too soon? I simply have no problem basing my relationship with a smoking hot red-head Russian spy on secrecy and lies  - and sex, myah sladkaya, lots of vokda sex. Na Strovya!

So this is Heidi Montag in in her *ahem* adult magazine photoshoot.

Two things:

1. I’ve seen more nudity in the Bible
2. I’ve seen less airbrushing on a beaded t-shirt in Myrtle Beach South Carolina

Why do they airbrush the SHIT out of these things? She’s like 24 and has huge tits. She’s all set. It’s not like she’s some aging actress trying to get back some of the glory of the Buffy days (sorry Kristy! Call me!). We don’t need “sexy elegant” here. This magazine sits on the back of the toilet in a frat house, not the desk of the CEO of Bank of America next to Yachting Digest.  I mean how classy can you really be with your tits hanging out in a spank mag photo session? But I digress…

Speaking of naked tits. THERE ARE NONE. It’s the ultimate tease by a girl who will probably make every man in her life put his fist through a wall. I’m pretty sure Jesus doesn’t give you partial credit. So, enjoy? These will probably be gone within a few hours.

Exclusive!! New nude cellphone pics of Vanessa Anne Hudgens! Well, its not really exclusive, because a bazillion other sites beat me to the punch. But she sure is naked! Click here to go see the set of Vanessa Hudgens nude pics. musicals kick ass!