Posts tagged Michael Jackson
Jakko To Announce Molestation Tour
Mar 5th
The gloved molestor is back. Jakko is planning on touring London with his list of ear bleeding hits. I am assuming he just needs the money. Jakko always needs the money. According to OMGÂ legions of fans awaited Michael to make the announcement of the tour. Legions?Is that the 5 members of N.A.M.B.L.A. who think Jakko would make a kick ass spokesperson for their cause?
And do you remember all that Jakko shit you could buy from an auction including Jakko’s socks? Well apparently he was not behind that auction and it was actually just shit they found lying around Neverland ranch when it was obtained by creditors or whoever. Jakko launched a law suit against those people and is trying to get the stuff back. So if you had a fantasy of jacking off with Jakko’s rhinestone studded glove, I am sorry. You will not get your wish.
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Jacko Has A Cold
Dec 22nd
OK so saying he has a cold is drastically understating what is actually wrong with Michael Jackson. He is actually suffering from a rare disease called Alpha-1 antitrypsin deficiency. Two of the symptoms from this disease is emphysema and gastrointestinal bleeding. Ouch. He is also going blind in his left eye.
That whacko Jacko. Always wearing silly gloves, always wearing silly clothes, always introducing silly diseases to America. What a character. I wonder if it will go down in history as only a coincidence that once Michael passes away child molestation rates drop dramatically.
