Fatback Media

Kim Kardashian is sick of seeing her sisters do so well and she is left in the dust has a has been Playmate and is not really famous for doing anything in particular. She says she wants to have a kid and get married before she is 30. I think that is a pretty good goal but you have to settle down first.

The last thing this world needs is another Kardashian running around violating couches across the world with their giant ass. Also, someone should tell Kim that you can not get pregnant by letting another guy pee in your mouth. You get the jist of it but it is the wrong liquid going in the wrong hole.

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Links that are artificially inseminated

Hilary Duff has nipple pokies- IDLYITW

Cute college girl of the day- College Humor

Peaches Geldof is modeling- Holy Moly

Adam Lambert has a new music video out- popbytes

Britney Spears settles lawsuit, ruins see through moment- Amy Grindhouse

The Hills recap- IBBB

Nicole Richie shows off her latest offspring- notorious news

Kelly Brook is cleavagey nice- IDLYITW

This calendar is nuts!- Fatback Media (NSFW)

Not to be outdone by her little sister Khloe, and basically for the reason that she didn’t want to look like a loser like Jennifer Aniston, Kim Kardashian has hooked back up w/ Reggie Bush. I don’t know if it is the money he has in the bank or the taste of his urine that attracts Kim to the running back but they are back and sources say it is for real this time.

A source says, ” They are totally back together for real. Kim and Reggie spent a few months apart getting their priorities together and figuring out who they were as individuals so they can make it work together.” Sounds like they will go for the long haul. Married with children. Til death do them part. What the fuck am I saying? Kim will swindle Reggie for his money just like Khloe is going to do with Lamar Odem. She will convince Reggie that she is so in love that a pre-nup is offensive. They after they fuck on a nightly basis for a year or so, she will call it off. And will get rich for doing so. The name Kardashian will no longer go down in history as a member of the O.J. Simpson dream team but a group of the savviest gold diggers in the history of the U.S.A.

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Gold digging links

Amy winehouse is cured- IDLYITW

Old people should just stick to pooping their pants- Geno’s World

Claire Danes is off the market- Celebrity Dirty Laundry

Audrina Patridge interview- I Don’t Want Your Life

Jessica Alba is a red head now- yeeeah

Jon Gosselin gets fired from Jon and Kate Plus 8- notorious news

Britney has a new song- IDLYITW

This is when you know there is not shit for news out there on a Monday. When todays top story is Kim Kardashian dying her hair blonde. She is pretty much famous for being famous and makes news just going to restaurants anyway so I am not too surprised. On the upside she looks really good. And she is single so I actually have a shot at banging her. Right guys? Right?

Here she is photographed at The Teen Choice Awards even though she has practically no business being there but she is good at stuff like that. The only beef I have is the fact that she didn’t go all the way blonde. She has blonde highlights really not full on blonde hair. I figured an attention whore like her would do what most media freaks would do and go full on platinum blonde. Either way I want to see her naked so I am going to dig up an old issue of Playboy while the rest of the world beats off to a pic from the green carpet. Suckers!

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Links that are bald

Lindsay is losing her hair- IDLYITW

2009 Teen Choice Awards winners- Allie Is Wired

Heather Graham is in a bikini- Drunken Stepfather

Sienna Miller hates Sienna Miller’s movies- Celeb News Wire

Cute college girl of the day- College Humor

Sharon Stone is topless- IDLYITW