Founder of Girls Gone Wild Joe Francis was arrested Monday for showing up 5 hours late to his court appearance for tax evasion. His excuse? He had the flu. I don’t know what rich people that can afford just about any bail think about going to jail, but if I was threatened with jail time, only a broken spine would keep me from appearing in court. The reason for the court date was that Francis tried to write off $20 million in bogus assets which apparently is a crime.

It kind of makes you wonder why he would even bother to get a few mil on his taxes. Isn’t the dude like a billionaire? He has had sex with probably the hottest girls to ever be captured taking their tops off on video. He may be rich, but come to think of it, I haven’t seen a new Girls Gone Wildvideo in years. No word yet on what his bail was set at or what the charges carry regarding jail time. I am sure he will get off. In more way than one more likely. Since he is sick he will probably try to bribe a guard or two to get some Tylenol with the hundred dollar bills he has shoved up his keister for just such an emergency.

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Super class act -  and creator of most of the content on my hidden 2nd hard drive -  Joe Francis (of Girls Gone Wild fame) recently told E!’s Hollywood Party Girl that Lindsay was straight  – not gay – and went on to say she had a huge cavernous vazhe. [Okay I made that last part up, but in my defense this story is pretty boring]

“Lindsay’s straight,” he offered. “I think Sam has taken ownership of Lindsay. I think if Sam were to let Lindsay go even that much; Lindsay would revert back to being straight.”

Ronson’s rep declined to comment saying, “We don’t comment on stuff like that,” while LiLo’s rep has yet to respond.

Francis was reported to have dated Linds in her prerehab days and she even vacationed at his Casa Aramara mansion in Mexico.   (E!)

Snore. We get it Joe, you fucked a lot of underage girls. Jesus. You don’t see me running around bragging about how I had sex with three smokin’ hot Filipino cheerleaders who were all sisters when I was in high school do you? I’m way too classy for that shit. Plus I’m a big fan of adobado.

These pics show Lindsay Lohan at an Ugly Betty party looking every bit of the smoking hot, 42 yr old cougar. Reeeow.