Fatback Media

It is being reported this morning that Howie Mandel from Deal Or No Dealis being treated for an irregular heart beat. I am no sadist but I hope this, not so much kills him, but keeps him from ever going on tv again. He shaves his head when he is not bald. He does that lame little fist bump when contestants come on the show. And he for some reason wears earrings. I have absolutely nothing against gay people, but it is pretty clear that Howie Mandel is in the closet. Why else would you never hear about him going on dates or getting engaged?

I once shaved my head and pierced my ears in an attempt to get women. When that didn’t work, I walked up to girls in the bar and pointed towards my penis and said, “ladies, please.” They didn’t know what I was talking about so I put my fists in the air and expected them to bump them and they just slapped me in the face and stormed out of the room. What the fuck Howie. Your dating tips suck.

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