Maybe it’s the holidays, or maybe I’m getting a little drunk this morning, but Britney’s rack is making me tingle. I know I’ve ripped her in the past, but the way she looks now, I would tear that shit up like a raccoon in a metal trashcan. There’s just something that’s white hot about a ragged out former teen beauty queen with two kids and a loser ex-husband, but then again I was born in trailer park.The thing that really puts the frosting on my Red Velvet is that she’s on lockdown from her kids. No strings, baby. I gotta let my Freebird Fly.