Posts tagged Chris Brown
What Will Happen?
Jun 22nd
Today is a landmark day in the Chris Brown assault trial. Rihanna will be in court and it is expected for her to be a good civilian, and victim, and testify against that little bitch Chris Brown. But it is clear that she can not be forced to testify. Even if she refuses to testify, Mark Geragos, Chris Brown’s attorney, may be able to get a pretty decent plea deal.
The whole goal of the Chris Brown legal team is to avoid jail time altogether. I suppose it doesn’t really matter if he goes to the clink or not. His career is over and there isn’t a snowballs chance in hell that he will ever record with a talented artist or anyone big in “the business” again. However, I heard that there is an opening for human punching bag at the local anger management class. He should look into it.
Chris Brown Might Get Off
Apr 29th
Chris Brown is as guilty as the sky is blue, but since the cops suck at concealing evidence he may walk. Most people, especially readers of this site have seen the pictures of Rihanna beaten and bloody. But the pictures were obtained through a leak, and that is what give Chris Brown’s attorney, Mark Geragos, the ammunition to get the entire case dismissed.
Geragos says in his own words, “The leaks can form the basis for a motion to dismiss the case in regards to outrageous governmental misconduct.” That sounds like a bunch of lawyer mumbo jumbo to me. What happened to the law you beat the shit out of a helpless girl and deserve to have your ass molested in prison for the next several years. Yea, yea I like the second option better.
Links that learned at a very young age to keep their hands to themselves
Horseface and pussypants are expecting twins- IDLYITW
Speidi are healthy- Allie Is Wired
Harriet Carter Wednesday- IBBB
Octomom can’t even get a dog- Amy Grindhouse
Sean Penn is getting a divorce- Celeb News Wire
Heidi Montag might pose in Playboy- yeeeah
Diora Baird in FHM- IDLYITW
Jennifer Love Hewitt got her figure back- I Don’t Want Your Life
Naomi Campbell is retiring- Holy Moly
Lindsay Lohan is still rocking the bikini- Drunken Stepfather
Jennifer Aniston is adopting! Yea, I’ll beleive that when I see her titties getting sucked- popbytes
Halle Berry looks better. – Celebrity Dirty Laundry
I Want To Work For Diddy 2 is casting- Geno’s World
Jewel is still famous? – Seriously? OMG! WTF?
Mel Gibson has landed a hot new piece of ass- notorious news
Cute college girl of the day- College Humor
Chris Brown Was Arraigned
Apr 7th
Yesterday was Chris Brown’s arraignment and he finally faced the music. But being the little 19 year old punk that he is, he plead not guilty while he waits for a plea deal from prosecutors. Now according to some insiders, Rihanna will testify if the case goes to court but Chris Brown is doing literally everything in his power to make sure that doesn’t happen.
Diddy was an enabler in this whole thing so maybe he can talk to the prosecutors. He played a lawyer on CSI. That qualifies him as a prosecutor right? Chris’s mother was inside the courtroom either crying or praying, sources couldn’t decide. I don’t see Chris walking away from this. If I were in his shoes I would just go ahead and plea guilty and get the jail time over with. It is not like he will be able to find work as a musician after all of this. I am personally sick of hearing about this story so this is probably the last time you will hear about it until his next arraignment on April 29.
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Links that keep their hands to themselves
Screw you, Madonna- IDLYITW
Sienna Miller has dirty feet- Drunken Stepfather
Gwyneth Paltrow is smart- Allie Is Wired
The Hills recap- IBBB
Cute college girl of the day- College Humor
Amy Winehouse is an ateention whore in the Caribbean- Celeb News Wire
Kate Beckinsale is a lady- IDLYITW
Farrah Fawcett looked great in her hey day- yeeeah
Eliza Dushku is pretty- I Don’t Want Your Life
Jodie Marsh is topless and made my day- Holy Moly
Prince Harry is kind of a douche bag- Amy Grindhouse
Get your own celebrity wax figure- popbytes
American Idol‘s top 8 perform tonight- Seriously? OMG! WTF?
Zac Efron is too good for social networking- Celebrity Dirty LaundryÂ
Video of Lauren Conrad on the beach- Geno’s World
Lauren Conrad is done with The Hills – notorious news
Chris Brown And RiRi Are “Taking A Break”
Mar 18th
After Chris Brown beat Rihanna to a pulp, they started feeling sorry for each other and they hooked back up. They even recorded a duet together. Now Rihanna flew to New York to hang out with some of her other music mogul friends while chris Brown stayed back in L.A. to record a cd that no one on earth is going to buy. Sources say that Chris is just obsessed with his music and that is why he didn’t make the trip.
Truth be told, if he ever showed his facein the presence of Jay-Z and other music stars, they would probably beat the shit out of him. That and the fact that Rihanna is probably sick and tired of dating someone who looks like they are 15 years old. You know I have been in a similar situation before. I have had to smack around hos now and then. Give em’ my 2 cents. Put them in their place. And the result was unquestioned loyalty and total service on their part. Get me a lemonade was no longer a request but a direct order. And in the end, we were both better for it. So watch out Chris Brown. Don’t let your little slave escape to NYC where her music friends will fill her head with ideas of liberalism and freedum. Keep that bitch under your thumb.
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Links that are in a solid relationship
Everyone is ugly next to Doutzen Kroes- IDLYITW
Kentucky Fried Chicken doesn’t have “chefs” – IBBB
Natasha Richardson is not dead- Holy Moly
Faye Dunaway looks like a burn victim- Drunken Stepfather
Hayden Panettiere is a pig- I Don’t Want Your Life
Reese Witherspoon is off the market? Doubt it- yeeeah
Amber Le Bon is a model- IDLYITW
Guy Ritchie has moved on from Madonna- Celeb News Wire
Lady Gaga wants to bang Prince Harry- Allie Is Wired
Tori Amos has a new kickass single- popbytes
Octomom brings home two of her octuplets- Geno’s World
American Idol’s Adam Lambert is scary- Seriously? OMG! WTF?
Cute college girl of the day- College Humor
Octomom gets swarmed by paparazzi- notorious news
