So apparently Mischa Barton is pissed that the cellulite photos of her 22 year old cottage cheese ass hit the internet, because they were photoshopped by a meanie paparazzo. She also said that she ‘loves her curves and so does her boyfriend and that’s that‘, or something to that effect. Obviously we all know that she is no longer a hot 19 year old model, she’s a run of the mill stoner valley girl.

I think people have the wrong impression about cellulite. Lots of girls have it, even skinny girls. Some of it is genetic, but mostly it’s just stoner chicks who are too lazy to exercise after high school when their metabolism finally kicks in and they get curves in all the wrong places.  A fun activity for you and your friends is to go back your high school year book and take a look at all the hotties who ate McDonalds every day and drank beer like it was water but always managed to stay tight and thin. Then go down to the mall and wait in the food court to see what nature has wrought. Exciting!

Moral of the story? Get off your ass and do some stair steppers and let your hair grow back out. You’re an embarrassment, tubby.

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