NSFW – Fatback Media

Jolene Blalock is hotter than a phaser set to stun. And she’s stunning the shit out of me with those nipples. I love art. And these nearly nude photos of a dripping wet Jolene Blalock are black and white which means they officially art. Which means your boss can’t fire you for looking at them at work. Unless your pants are around your ankles.

So yeah these are old but still awesome naked pictures of Ashley Massaro the awesomely nude wrestler. I’ve never seen her on tv, but I assume she’s usually showing her thong and wearing ironic  librarian’s glasses as she breaks a chair over some bloody, beefed up bastard in a speedo and steroid rage to spare. Welcome to America, where our reality tv is not real, just like our tits and carefully mown pubic hair. Hurrah!

It’s hard not to sound racist when saying that but Zhang Ziyi really is Asian, you know. No, seriously. I used to date an Asian chick and I know what you’re thinking: It was all samurai swords and dim sum and crazy sex that involved incense, tea leaves and wooden objects. Well, David Duke, it turns out that Vun couldn’t cook at all. So put that in your wok and steam it. Jeez.

This is Lily Allen nude in Jamaica, the way all cute little British singers should be in Jamaica. I’m not sure if it’s even legal to be topless in Jamaica, but I know that man can not make a law in defiance of the Lord. And if I remember correctly, the Bible says that hot chicks are supposed to be topless at the beach. I’m paraphrasing of course.