NSFW - Fatback Media

Ok, so she’s at the beach, so it’s not like she’s Britney Spears airing it out when she gets out of a limo, but even with a bikini and shorts on, Denise Richards’ vagina seems to makes its way out into the sunshine. Ritchie Sambora, who should be out doing evil deeds to uphold his contract with devil, seems oblivious that his insanely hot girlfriend is sunning her labia and seems more interested in scorching the grizzled hair patches off his chest. Except for the dirty cheating whore part, Denise Richards may be my favorite hot mom. Wait, did I say except for? I meant especially. Oh pic number four is older and out of context, but you really don’t care now do you?

Wow. Talk about news that travels fast. The well publicized breakup of Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards is everywhere this week, but The Smoking Gun has some of the gory details of Denise’s allegations against Charlie, including sexual deviancy, assault and child pornography. Here are some excepts:

In a remarkable sworn declaration (link) filed today in Los Angeles Superior Court, Richards also charges that Sheen, 40, assaulted her and threatened her life during a December 30 incident at the actress’s Los Angeles home. Richards claims that an enraged Sheen–who was over for a visit with the couple’s two children–told her she was “fucking with the wrong guy” and called her a series of vulgar names in front of the children. The actor, Richards said, then shoved her to the ground and screamed, “I hope you fucking die, bitch.” As Richards, 35, tells it, Sheen was angry because she had told her divorce attorney about discovering details of Sheen’s porn-surfing practices. Richards’s declaration, filed in support of her request for a restraining order against Sheen, contends that Sheen “belonged” to “disturbing” sites “which promoted very young girls, who looked underage to me with pigtails, braces, and no pubic hair performing oral sex with each other.” Other sites visited by Sheen, Richards alleges, involved “gay pornography also involving very young men who also did not look like adults.” Richards claims that she also discovered that Sheen “belonged to several sex search type sites” on which he “looked for women to have sex with.” His online profile, Richards adds, included a photo of “his erect penis.” The Richards evisceration also portrays Sheen as a lousy father who urged her to abort their first child.

In his defense, I’m pretty sure that you’re supposed to show your penis in your sex search profile and I’m sure those girls with pig tails are of age. As for the very young men engaging in activities, I’m sure they had no idea the camera was running and thought it was an art project. Plus, they probably got paid and taken to eat at The Sizzler afterwards so they would stop crying.

The Smoking Gun article also shows the transcripts of six voicemails left by Charlie on Denise’s machine. Here’s one excerpt:

Wow. Dickface? I don’t know Charlie. Sounds like you need to brush up on your insults, pimp. I point your attention to the use of the epithet, “fucking nigger” to describe your wife. That’s a bit harsh, don’t you think, not to mention somewhat of a misnomer? Apropos of that, a more fitting term would be dirty white bread cracker whore. See? Rolls right off the tongue. And, it has much more of a feeling of appropriateness. N’est, pas? You’d think someone whose dad was born Ramon Gerard Antonio Estevez, would be a little more versed in his racial slurs - even if he tries to pass himself off as a drunken mick. Oops. There I go. See how it starts Charlie? It’s all fun and games till somebody gets hurt.