NSFW – Fatback Media

Well, I take back everything I said about Tara Conner and how country girls go wild because of religious repression. Say hello to Miss Nevada baby! She’s everything that’s right about hot chicks and beauty pageants. She’s hot and has a great rack. She kisses other hot girls, has no tan lines and she doesn’t mind nudity. At all. Joy to the fucking world.

Shocking photos of a Miss USA contestant have come hot on the fashionable heels of a scandal that rocked reigning Miss USA Tara Conner.

The raunchy pics show Katie Rees, Miss Nevada 2007, exposing her breasts, passionately kissing other young women, and simulating oral sex with females and a male. (source)

Seasonal Links:

• Angelique Boyer missed jailbait by this much. Pervs. (Bastardly)
• Victoria Beckham cut her short because she’s a whore. Short haired girls are whorish. (Yeeeah)
• Britney cell phone pics from Forty Deuce. Whore. (Drunken stepfather)
• Get you Luvah a Snorg Tee for Christmas you cheap skate. (Snorg tees)
• Make your own t-shirts you creative bastards. (Cafe press)
• Miss Teen USA dropped by MADD becuase Drunk whore. (Bumpshack)

Here’s some more of Miss Nevada, Katie Rees ensuring a her new career as person who gets pad because she’s hot. (I to the muh’fucking E: Hooter’s girl)

COMPLETELY NON SEXY UPDATE: So I had to remove those images of Miss Nevada and all her sexy, girl on girl naked cavorting because apparently I don’t know much about the law even though I have watched like 40 years of Law & Order. Once I get the legal details worked out I’ll post the nudey nudes again. Till then, go here while they last. PS. They are NSFW unless you have a PDA you dirty dog.

Share the naked celebrity goodness, y'all!

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Miss USA Tara Conner is sooooo sorry y’all. Look at those tears! I mean she just got a second chance to be our Ambassador of American-ossity and Apple Pie-ness, y’all. That’s really somethin’. Here are some of the details from her fake tear-filled press conference.

I wouldn’t say that I’m an alcoholic. I think that would be pushing the envelope,” said Conner, who was known in New York’s nightclub scene for drinking hard, snorting cocaine and hooking up with a long string of men.

The beauty queen said she celebrated her 21st birthday Monday with Diet Coke and iced tea – but Trump said he’ll force her to take regular drug tests.

“I don’t think she’s denying she’s an alcoholic,” said Trump, who owns the Miss USA pageant. “She can be a great example for troubled people – and she’s troubled – for troubled people … that have problems with alcohol.” (source)

Miss USA is very lucky to have been given the privilege to once again represent the USA and be the role model that little girls all over America need. Did she give up when she was caught feeling up a teen beauty queen or busted doing coke and sleeping around? Hells no! She did what her title and standing demanded for the situation. She gave Donald Trump a blow job. Because that’s how you solve problems when you’re Miss USA, god damn it. You put on some black nail polish, a smart suit with just enough cleavage and give Donald Trump a blow job. God bless America.

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Sorry about all the Miss USA stuff this week but Lindsay and Paris are starting to bore me. So…

Daddy issues notwithstanding, Tara Conner is pretty damn hot. And easy. And she likes to kiss girls. So basically, she’s perfect. I mean, obviously you wouldn’t want to marry her, because you would spend five years nurturing a bleeding ulcer while she methodically banged every man, woman, and child that you know, only to leave you for a doctor [read: richer new daddy] and a new Range Rover, thus continuing a cycle that will only end in tears. Not hers of course. Yours.

So why all the fuss anyway? What can you really expect from a contest that asks women to objectify themselves in one breath, strutting the stage in a bikini and validate themselves in the next “I want world peace and puppies and love…ooh and I want to own my own business…” all the while being judged on beauty and “poise”. It’s a ridiculous farce so thinly veiled that it’s borderline cruel. The fact that Donald Trump runs the show should be a clue that the only real talent in these so-called contests is a nice rack and toothy smile. So, if the contest is based on how beautiful [read:sexy] you are, then how can you blame Tara Conner for adhering to the established (albeit whispered) standard for sexiness? This is the MTV generation on crack. We have 15 year old girls who are considered sex symbols, NFL cheerleaders making out in bar room stalls and not a thong to be found between Lindsay, Britney or Paris. Tara Conner is not a misguided libertine who failed her duties of office; she’s a fucking overachiever. God Bless Miss America.

So it’s holiday week and none of you are working, or my server wouldn’t be on it’s knees crying for help. Here’s some more stuff to keep you busy.

• Kelly Clarkson is a sloppy drunk. (Yeeeah)
• Kelly Brooke: still hot. Still has a giant rack. Still warrants masturbation in bikini shots. (Derek Hail)
• Joanna Krupa would rather be naked. (Bastardly)
• Brooke Hogan. Well…kinda trampy. Merry Holidays! (Drunken Stepfather)
• The Devil Wears a Documentary. Anna Wintour behind the scenes due soon. (Socialite’s life)
• Will Smith will make you cry. For reals. (Pajiba)
• Christmas Wishes from the Antichrist. (College Humor)

Super sexy update: Shazam. Reports are filtering in that Miss USA Tara Conner has lost her crown, been evicted from her Trump Tower apartment and is working at The Olive Garden in Russell County Kentucky. Ok I made that last part up. What I didn’t make up is that Miss USA is freak-nasty.

One day after pageant boss Donald Trump publicly denied that reigning Miss USA Tara Conner was being dethroned, TMZ has learned that first runner-up, Miss California Tamiko Nash, will be inheriting the crown. (TMZ)

According to the News, Conner is on the verge of losing her tiara after testing positive for cocaine, kissing Miss Teen USA in public and reportedly sneaking men into their Trump Place apartment, sources tell the paper. (Post Chronicle)

You can take the girl out of Kentucky…Wait. Did I read those CRTL-B’s correctly? She was doing coke and kissing Miss Teen USA and banging dudes in her luxury apt? She just went from country-come-town to holy shit that sounds like porn I would pay for. I thought the requirement for pageantry was poise, grace, vaseline teeth and a nice rack, not kissing underage girls and doing key bumps in the bathroom stall at a bar. [Otherwise, I'd be a shoe-in.]
I just hope all that fun was worth it because she has arguably ruined any benefit she would have gotten from this contest including a scholarship, world peace and saving puppies. Thanks. Puppy killer.

On the other hand, hot religiously repressed, coked out country chicks whose lives are crashing down around them are pretty easy. Call me.