NSFW - Fatback Media

Reality show supergroup offspring Supernova didn’t make the headlines quite as planned. In fact their flaccidly hyped album, which should have been a rock icon wet dream, failed to break thorugh the Billboard Top 100 this week. Supenova. the bell tolls for thee. Jugga junn junn. Jugga junn JUNN.

Rock Star: Supernova, the latest spawn of reality guru Mark Burnett’s Rock Star franchise, had all the earmarks of a true supergroup - members from Motley Crue, Metallica and Guns N’ Roses; a high-profile personality in drummer Tommy Lee; and a predecessor in INXS, whose “Rock Star” success with lead singer, J.D. Fortune, garnered a Top 20 album and a sold-out tour. (source)

The reason Supernova didn’t flourish is simple: they bumped out ultra hot rockers Storm Large and Dilana. Those girls were smokin’ hot and both look like they could handle themselves in a fight and could get rid of a body if neceesary. Even if their music sucked, who wouldn’t pay to watch them crawl around on stage in black leather, low-cut tees and wildly colored hair singing distressed tunes of love unrequited. Hell, I’d pay to see them fight. Everyone loves a good chick fight. Rrreow.

Ultra hot rocker Storm Large and Magni, a fellow finalist on Rockstar Supernova were fired from the tour with the band. This is another in a host of problems that has plagued this band. First, another band called Supernova successfully sued for the rights to that name and now this.

Tommy Lee and the rest of the band, including the show’s winner Lukas Rossi, changed the name to Rockstar Supernova.With a tour scheduled to begin on New Year’s Eve in Vegas, the bill’s opening act was to include The Panic Channel, host Dave Navarro’s latest band, as well as, fellow contestants Toby Rand, Dilana, Magni, Storm Large and the program’s House Band.

But now TMZ has learned that due to financial reasons Magni, Storm Large and the House Band have been kicked off the tour. Toby and Dilana are still on board (thank God!), but will now be backed by Toby Rand’s Australian group Juke Kartel. (source)

Storm Large is better off without that band anyway. I’m pretty sure her deal with the devil has an exclusivity clause anyway. Kinda like my deal, except mine has a dead-sexy clause, and I win everytime. Stupid satan. Anyway, for all our nudie pictures of the Rockstar Supernova chicks go here: Supernova Nudity on FB&C

A rumor is making its rounds right now that the winner of Rockstar Supernova has already been chosen and the show is merely a formality. Columnist Janet Charlton revealed earlier this week that Tommy Lee and the Supernova gang had chosen Lukkas Rossi. Dave Navarro had this to say on his blog.

Damn there are some funny rumors around regarding the show. First of all, I don’t know who Janet Charlton is, but I do know who she isn’t. She aint no Perez Hilton, that’s for sure. At least with Perez, you get humor and the rumors are at least based in SOME fact. He leaves it up to the reader to do the dance between the two. As for Janet, she just kind of sees what sticks. Well, with Rockstar, she doesn’t have a clue as to what she is talking about. If she has an inside source… Name it! Come on! I dare you! Name it! If you don’t know what I am talking about… She has claimed that she knows who the winner is. Trust me… Nobody knows until it’s over.(source)

Supernova confuses me. I like the show and I watch it every week (mostly to lick the screen when Storm Large is singing), but it just seems too contrived. If I were looking for a singer for my LA rock band, I would just go to a mental hospital and grab the orderly who rapes the coma patients and sell their pills. Or go to a strip club and grab the girl with the bloody nose who cries when she gives lap dances. That’s because I’m a rocker, baby. I live every day to rock out with my cock out, hard core style as an evil doer in the service of Satan’s angels. Unicorns must die. Here are some NSFW Brook Burke pics since you’ve already seen the naked Storm Large pics.

UPDATE: So as of tonight Lukkas is the Rockstar Supernova winner. I guess I was right. And by that I mean, look at Brook Burke naked!

Rockstar: Supernova kicked off another wannabe rocker hopeful last night. The band really pulled out the big guns in their criticism and it seems that they are getting more serious about this competition. Here’s the recap:

Brooke Burke…blah blah blah. Scenes from the house…blah blah blah. Storm Large singing an encore of the Anything, Anything by Dramarama that she sang the night before. Storm Large looking hot and sexy. Storm Large rocking the house. Storm Large taunting me. Luring me. Tempting me. Storm Large nipslip? Rewind the DVR. Freeze Frame. Definitely slipped, but not much to see. Damn it! Stupid camera angle. Storm Large falls backward into a pile of her own sexniess. Other singers…blah blah blah. Phil Ritchie goes home.

Storm Large is possibly the sexiest person that has ever lived. The dichotomy of her sexuality - at once angelic princess and sultry demoness - makes me shiver in the cold darkness. I want her to tattoo me. Oh, by the way. I G-O-O-G-L-E’d her and found these artsy NSFW’s in case you haven’t see them before.

The new show Rockstar: Supernova is a reality tv show (contest?) where would be rockers are basically auditioning to be in the new band Supernova by singing shitty tunes from the seventies for the other band mates. The show rocks. It’s like if American Idol drank a bottle of Jack, dropped some acid and did some rails off of a hot chick’s ass. Speaking of hot amazonian ass (dot dot dot). Tommy Lee was flirting with slammin’ hotness Storm Large on last week’s show when this went down:

“I want to see more of you,” Lee oozed after the Amazonian singer performed “Just What I Needed” by The Cars in a bid to front Lee’s new band with former Metallica bassist Jason Newsted and Gilby Clarke from Guns N’ Roses.

“I’ve got six letters for you,” Large retorted without missing a beat. “G-O-O-G-L-E.” But Lee and any viewers calling up the sinewy singer’s site with her band The Balls would see the following message: “Some of the links on this site are inactive during Storm’s appearance on ‘Rock Star’ per rule of the Powers-That-Be in Hollywood. I know, we’re as bummed as you are, but we cooperated.”(source)

Unfortunately for the producers of Rockstar, I’m a famous internet detective and nothing is beyond my reach, bitches.

The thing I like about Storm large is that she is not only hot like the fires of hell, but she can fucking rock. There’s nothing sexier than a six foot tall Amazon warrior rocking out with devil horns on stage who can literally kick your ass. Well, that is unless you happen to find some NSFW, yet highly artistic, shots of her half naked body to view in the privacy of your cubicle. I could be all cheesy and go for the obvious jokes involving her name (exempli gratia: The perfect Storm, Storm is a Large rocker, Stormy Monday never looked so good, et cetera) but I won’t because I am a serious fucking writer. So, here are some shots of Storm Large that will cause a hurricane in your shorts. NSFW’s after the jump, you dirty dogs. (sexy images via:domela.com)