NSFW – Fatback Media

R&B star and Kim Kardashian sex tape co-star (?) Ray J has dreams of becoming Mayor of Carson California, not a huge stretch considering Ahnold is the guvnah and Sonny Bono was a member of Congress. Except, Ray J is a naughty, naughty boy and his sex tape controversy may be keeping him out of office.

The singer/actor has huge political ambitions and his leaked sex tape, in which he cavorted with socialite Kim Kardashian, wrecked his bid to become Carson’s mayor this year (07) – but he isn’t giving up. He tells Sister 2 Sister magazine, “I might do it at the next election and let all of this controversy die down and then hit them harder.”

“I want people to look at other things besides rapping and singing… Young people 18 and older don’t vote. When I get people to start voting and start uplifting themselves in the political side of life… I’m making a change in the world. “I’m going to keep going. I’m going for president of the United States of America.” (source)

Ahh hahaha, “hit them harder”. That’s what she said. Seriously though, I’m all for electing porn stars to public offices. John Holmes can be the Thruster of the House. Linda Lovelace can play Bush. And Elisha Cuthbert can be the Fist Lady. (Okay I know she isn’t a porn star, but she played one once and that’s basically the same thing.) Sessions of Congress would really just be consecutive days of orgies and the State of the Union addresses would be broadcasts of classic hits like Ally McFeal, Nightmare on Dyke Street and Dial A for Anal. Holy shit, the ideas are rolling…where’s my pen??

Oh. Umm. We at FB&C acknowledge free love and its consequences so before you tag it, bag it. No glove, no love. And so on. Holla!

Katie Holmes is pissed. New York Post reports that a young virgin has changed her name to Katee Holmes and will be starting a porn career, in which she will lose her virginity in her first film. Get it? Katie, Katee? Duh.

“It’s a really cheap shot,” a rep for the actress, who’s married to Tom Cruise, told Page Six. But Shy Love, an adult film vet who manages the 5-foot-9, 122-pound Katee – a small-town girl from Illinois – insisted: “Katee is using the name as a tribute to Katie, who has always portrayed an innocence in everything she’s done, beginning with ‘Dawson’s Creek.’ ”

“I know it’s pretty extreme to lose my virginity on camera, but I like the fulfillment and excitement I get from watching porn, so I figured [a movie] was the best place for me to lose it,” the not-that-innocent Katee said. “How many people wished they could relive their first experience, if not to remember it but to learn from it, right?” (source)

Man, what a whore. But guys love whores. I think they’re taken aside at an early age and shown cheap porn mags like Cheri, or Oui, forever conditioning them to hit on the cheapest, sluttiest girl in the bar. That being said, it’s like Katee stole the idea right out of my goddamned head. No doubt you will be lined up to see this nubile, young thing lose her love flower, wishing you were the one giving her the bulging love stick. What the fuck did I just say? Anyway, instead, you are crying, realizing you just lost your virginity to the 19 year-old hag babysitter who punched you in the face as she called you the wrong name. Then she made you get her McDonalds. Sucked to be you. Loser. More Katee. I mean Katie. I mean Kate.

Marilyn Manson’s new video was just released and, much like my set of assless chaps, it’s causing some raised eyebrows. Apparently Marilyn and barely legal girlfriend, Evan Rachel Wood are actually having sex in the video.

It begins with a lengthy sex sequence in which Wood, who is 19, reaches a loud climax (no word on whether that’s fake). There’s also a segment in which the starlet, dressed as Lolita, rubs her crotch while watching Manson perform onstage, and another in which she lies drenched in blood.

According to a source close to the production crew, Manson and Wood elected not to fake their intercourse. Though their naughty bits are concealed on-screen by bedclothes and each other’s bodies, the logistics of the shoot ensured the crew members had an intimate view of the proceedings. (source)

I’m a pretty freaky guy. I’ll admit it. I like sexy Vampire chicks and blood and all that stuff – in the right context. The wrong context is a bloody Lolita who bangs Marilyn Manson. That just fucks up this whole Kate Beckinsale vampire thing I have had, forever. Plus, I used to like Evan Rachel Wood, but now she’s damaged goods. It’s like if you had a cute little kitten, all soft and sweet and then you let a Romanian Wolfhound fuck it in the ass. Yeah, it’s still cute, but no matter how much you were nice to it, you could never top that Wolfhound anal. That makes about as much sense as this video. If you get a boner, you’re going to hell. Like me.

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Well the Kim Kardashian sex tape brouhaha is about to be put to rest because apparently Kim Kardashian has settled with Vivid and they are pulling the tape.  I’m psyched, not only because I got to say brouhaha (say it!), but also because a) I watched for free (thanks internet!) and b) besides getting to see her big rack and her swallowing the happy ending, the vids were kinda weak.

Socialite Kim Kardashian has dropped a law suit against Vivid Entertainment for the release of Kim Kardashian Superstar, a sex video she made with her lover of three years, R&B artist Ray J, after Vivid agreed to pay her a financial settlement.

“We are pleased that Kim has dropped her legal action against us,” said Steven Hirsch, co-chairman of Vivid Entertainment in a statement released to Star. “We met with her several times and finally reached a financial arrangement that we both feel is fair.” The agreement is for Vivid to Kim for her hard work — a lump sum financial settlement for the sale of the DVDs.  (SOURCE)

So what’s the difference between a jobless, snotnose socialite who gets paid to have sex and a streetwalking whore? Marketing. Here’s Kim doing nothing and being famous for it. Maybe if I give her $100 bill she’ll take of her top. I think that’s fair.