NSFW – Fatback Media

Hey y’all Emily here. Total fucking psychopath Courtney Love says she had help with her recent recovery from drugs: Mel Gibson. Whaa…? I don’t get it either.

While she was doing drugs with some men in a posh Beverly Hills hotel room, Love revealed on Tuesday’s Good Morning America, the leading man – who himself only recently underwent his own sobering experience – showed up along with addiction counselor Warren Boyd.

“Mel kept coming to the door with this cheesy grin going, ‘Hi!’” Love said. “I just kept looking at him going, ‘Blank off!’ … I know him and he’s a nice guy, but it just didn’t matter who it was. It could have been Jesus. I didn’t care.”
Love, 42, was ordered into a rehab program in August 2005 after tearfully admitting in court that she’d used drugs in violation of her probation terms. At that point, she knew it was either rehab or jail. (source)

Look, I know I’m not always on the gravy train with cool kids like Ivanka Trump or Topher Grace (by the way, they’re banging), but I do know looking to self-righteous movie stars for validation isn’t on America’s top list of “cool things to do when you’re sober and can’t find a willing hooker”. Or is it? I need to get out more. Of course, now it doesn’t seem so radical to call on the big JC for advice when my last ex dumped me for his exponentially crazier new co-worker who doesn’t even have this charming southern accent. Makes sense, right? Fuck no! So I got my revenge with his hot second-cousin twice-removed from Spain. He didn’t know two sentences in English, but he said all the right things with his hands. Aye, Papi!

Share the naked celebrity goodness, y'all!

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Hey y’all. It’s Halloween, my favorite holiday and it’s time for the 1st annual FB&C Celebrity Halloween Costume Contest. Our panel of expert judges, mostly consisting of me, have reviewed the top celebrity costumes this year and we have decided on the winner. We’d like to thank the celebrities for all the really inspired costumes this year. We can’t say for sure, but from the look of things, most of our contestants planned out their costumes tens of minutes before leaving the house. Sweet! Here are the contestants. Continue after the jump.

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Actress Jessica Alba recently spoke out about how she left her born-again Christian church after accusations that her behavior was immoral.

Jessica Alba decided to leave her born-again Christian church after religious leaders accused her of being too promiscuous.The Dark Angel star insists her multi-ethnic appearance stopped her from being accepted in the Latin community she grew up in, so she turned to the church looking for comfort.

After four years as a born-again Christian, Alba backed away from religion because “older men would hit on me and my youth pastor said it was because I was wearing provocative clothing, when I wasn’t.
“It just made me feel like if I was in any way desirable to the opposite sex, that it was my fault, and it made me ashamed of my body and of being a woman.” (source)

I don’t know what kind of church she went to but it certainly wasn’t Christian. Christians are supposed to do-unto-others and love and encourage each other, not be intolerant, prudish assholes. Like my church. We all just ran around naked and had sex orgies that involved livestock and poisonous snakes. Every now and again someone would get their heart carved out by a hooded priest wearing face paint. Come to think of it, maybe I’m a devil worshipper. Shit. That’s not gonna sit well with JC.

Jessica Simpson and her sister Ashlee are destined for the fires of hell according to a Baptist minister who is lashing out at them for using sex to sell their records. Reverend Bob Harrington is publicly chastising the girls and their father for turning away from their religion for profits.

“Their father has replaced his faith in the Lord with the love of money, which is the root of all evil. He has replaced holiness with horniness,” the Sun quoted the holy man, as saying.

“They don’t represent American standards and certainly not Christian standards,” he added.

The religious leader has also used harsh words for the Dukes Of Hazzard star’s most prized possession – her over-sized boobs. He has said their boobs would end up drooping as punishment for their sins.

“Jessica and Ashlee will reap the dismal crops they are sowing. Their breasts will sag and their faces will wither and they will be left with nothing but a hollow shell,” said the priest. (source)

I think the fires of hell will welcome them both, with fiery open arms. Somehow, I picture this guy looking like the creepy dude in the black hat from Poltergeist 2. I’m not sure how comfortable I would feel going to church with him as the preacher. Of course, Sunday mornings in my house were spent watching my mom cry to the 700 Club because my newest “uncle” took off before breakfast and stole her smokes. Sinner.