NSFW - Fatback Media

You have no idea how long I have waited to use dooky chute in the title of a post. The reason I created this site in the first place was to one day be able to say dooky chute in a real live post. Well folks, that day has obviously come. Lily Allen the cute little gangsta girl from the UK recently found out she’s pregnant and also recently told her family that she lets her boyfriend (Ed Simons of the Chemical Brothers) drive the Hershey highway.

The pop star, famous for hits Smile and LDN, made the shocking revelation to her father after he questioned whether she had slept with the 37-year-old.

Allen, 22, announced she was expecting her first child with Simons, her boyfriend of three months, last week before she let her secret slip on Channel 4’s Big Fat Quiz of the Year.

“My dad’s wife said maybe you’re pregnant. I said no I’m not pregnant and my dad went: ‘Are you telling me you and your boyfriend have had sex?”

“I thought I would write a song about it that goes: ‘I didn’t know you could pregnant from the bum bum”. (source)

Bum-bum sex. Well, when she puts it that way, I’m sure her dad was just fine with it and not at all thinking about some aging DJ goring out his little girl’s asshole with her face pushed into a pillow. Cute!

Lilly Allen has been getting a lot of press here in the US lately. She’s apparently very popular in the UK and is now touring n the US in support of her new album. Why do I care? Because she’s so cute and talks so much shit about people.Here’s an exceprt from TeenPeople: (That’s right TEEN. PEOPLE. What?)

Your album has been getting great reviews, but …some have said it’s negative.
Lily Allen: English humor and American humor differ in that a lot of what I’m saying is quite sarcastic. I’m not trying to be negative. I’m trying to say be positive in a funny way and to make it more entertaining. There’s nothing more boring to me than saying the words “love” and “baby” 50 times throughout the song.

What do you make of American Idol or the British show X-Factor?Lily: It’s really sad that that’s what music has come to, because I don’t really see them as music shows. I see them as TV shows with people covering songs. It doesn’t have anything to do with musicianship because it’s not writing. Music is an art form and it’s not something just to be messed around with and made money out of. There are lots of people out there who have been working for years and years, really putting a lot of blood and guts into it. So for people to come along and just because they’ve got nice boobs and a nice haircut and kind of do some vocal acrobatics, they take a place in the music industry. It’s very sad.

You’ve been labeled an ‘It’ girl so we were wondering what you thought of some of the others that share that title. What do you think of Jessica Simpson?
Lily: I’m definitely not into her music.
Paris Hilton?
Lily: No comment.
How about Beyoncé?
Lily Allen: I love Beyoncé. She’s great. She’s a really amazing singer. And if she does write all of those songs, she’s an amazing songwriter as well.
Sienna Miller?
Lily: I don’t know. There’s something not likeable about her. I don’t know what it is.
What about Posh and Becks moving to Los Angeles?
Lily: Good. As long as they are out of my country.
And finally, what do you think of Britney Spears?
Lily: Um… I think she’s very entertaining. (source)

I like the way she’s sings and she’s cute as a button, but honestly when she talks, I can’t understand a god damn word. But that’s okay. Love like ours can overcome anything. I’ll dress her up in pretty clothes and brush her hair with 100 strokes and she’ll talk all funny and laugh then shank me in the kidney with her butterfly knife. Pic number 4 made me fall right into love with her.