There is a new movie coming out called The Killer Inside Me and in it Jessica Alba gets her tight little ass spanked like the bad girl that she is. This is the only picture that I can find of it, hence Megan Fox, but I enjoy it none the less. To peep out the entire video with some better ass shots head over to NS4W.org Trust me you will not be disappointed.

Hope you all had a successful Memorial Day weekend. Meaning you got drunk, ate too much and you’re now reading this with a Starbucks and and a hangover. I supported the troops this Memorial Day Weekend by doing a lot of All American activities like: drinking canned light beer, eating fried food, attending an outdoor concert in without sunscreen, talking loudly to foreigners to make them understand me better and urinating in a public park.

These paparazzi quality photos of Grace Potter were taken at Boston’s Earth Fest over the weekend. I’m thinking about adding a ridiculous watermark just to give them some street creds. In case you don’t know who Grace Potter is, she’s the tiny little girl in these pictures who is PLAYING A FLYING V GUITAR and making your girlfriend want to sleep with her. Her shows are like watching raw sexual soul being crafted up from a rock demon who ties an M-60 to your balls. That last part happens when you tell your date, “Of course I would hit that. DUH.”

• X-17 PWNED Perez Hilton. Again. FINISH HIM! (Evil beet)
• Anna Kournikova is single. Dibs. (Gabsmash)
• Justin Timberlake continues on his quest to piss me off with Jessica Biel. (Allie)
• Lindsay Lohan still drunken, whorish. (Bumpshack)
• John Mayer can’t quit those DD’s. (Celebrity Hubris)
• Heather Locklear in a bikini.God damn. (Bastardly)
• Rhianna in lingerie. (DS)
• Jessica Alba is chilly. (Ninja Dude)
• Keira Knightly may play Princess Dianna. (D-Listed)
• Lindsay Lohan puke. (Yeeeah)
• Grace Potter on Youtube (Youtube)
• Kym Johnson dances into my heart (FHM)

More Grace Potter rocking your shit.

Super hot movie star Jessica Alba claims she’s “goofy”?. And my question is: Who cares? She can claim to be Rolanda Queen of the Nicaraguan Sunsets as long as she keeps making movies in a bikini. Nothing says acting chops like a string bikini. True story.

“People think of me as just a sexy girl,” the self-described “dork,” 26, says in the June issue of InStyle, “but I’m really goofy – like, super goofy.”

Not that she’s knocking her looks, which first made her famous on the 2000-02 TV series Dark Angel. “I had womanly curves at a young age,” she says. “Usually kid actors are a few years older than the roles they play. I was two or three years younger.” (source)

This is the point where I would call Jessica a conceited whore because I really think she is, but with that body, goofy or not, she could poke out your eye with a pencil sharpened on the sidewalk and you’d still line up to drink her bath water. Where I come from, having curves at a young age is not as sexy as it may sound. It pretty much relegates you to marriage by senior year, dropping out and living in a trailer park taking care of three dirty faced children while your husband, the former football captain, shows off his skills as the manager of the Piggly Wiggly. I’m not saying that southern teen mothers are trashy uneducated whores. Well actually, yes. Yes I am. But Jesus loves them, god bless ‘em, and that’s all that matters.

Here’s Jessica getting into some trouble with the law. You have the right to remain sexy. Owwww.

Adriana Lima is probably the prettiest girl on the planet. I don’t think anyone will argue that. I know. I know. Beauty is subjective, and in the eye of the beholder and different for everyone, even at different times. Like right now, for me, Adriana Lima is pretty fucking close to the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen. But last week in San Jose, after 17 tequilas, Martina was the prettiest girl I had ever seen. Martina had a huge adam’s apple and never took off her panties. Oh but the way she held me on that warm spring night and carried back to my car over her shoulder. That’s true love baby. Although, I still can’t find my wallet.

•  Cameron Diaz sans bra. That’s fancy talk for she’s showing her nipples (DS)
• Would you like to come up to my apt for some BOOBIES? (CH)
• Bend it like Beckham’s wang. For the ladies (and a few of you dudes) (D-Listed)
• Paris Hilton is about to be caged (wonky eyed) heat. I have a carton of Newports that says she gets shiv’d within 48 hours. (IDLYITW)
• Jessica Alba kisses her dog. The dog has a boner. Maybe that’s just me. I like bestiality. (Jordan)
• Lindsay Lohan is a superhero. If being a bulemic, coke whore with daddy issues are the criteria for superness. (Yeeeah)
• Jennifer Tilly, still keeping the rack up to speed. (Bastardly)
• Perfect Stangers is perfect for Lifetime and a tub of Cherry Garcia. (Pajiba)

More Adriana.

I have no idea what this is from, but I am 1000% sure that I don’t care. Jessica Alba, tan and falling out of a bikini is enough to make me want to quit my job and fucking move to an island. How many times do you have to watch Office Space to realize that you’re that guy? Some days I just think, man this place would really fucking burn. LINKS!

• Jessica Alba in her underwear to make you hate your job even more. (IDLYITW)
• The entire movie Office Space reshot using Peeps. FUCKING PEEPS! I love peeps. (Youtube)
• Cameron Diaz in a bikini showing a little easter egg. She’s religious. (DS)
• David Duchovny is constipated. (Glitterati)
• Larry Birkhead, first redneck in history to claim his own bastard. (IBBB)
• Paris Hilton is a whore, and some other stuff blahblahblah. (Yeeeah)
• Jolene Blalock got some big ass…..(Bastardly)