NSFW – Fatback Media

So the reports of the Kim Kardashian Playboy shoot appear to be true. According to Us Magazine she’ll be on the December 2007 cover and inside she’ll be in a 12 page spread. Get it?

A Playboy source tells Us that Kardashian’s shoot reveals more than originally planned. Though her body is mostly draped in sheets and jewelry, the source says that Kardashian “will show one boob, and her bare butt.” (source)

Well, most of us have seen every inch of her already so the Playboy spread probably won’t raise too many eyebrows. Playboy is not exactly known for capturing staggering reality, so the pictures are likely to be so photoshopped that she’ll end up looking like Sienna Miller in a pirate outfit. Personally, I like my pornography with some veritas. I don’t need some art student trying to make me see the dichotomy of beauty and war by dressing a girl in scarves and photographing her on an oil tanker, I wanna see full-on raw nudity shot in someone’s shitty apartment with a Fuji Quicksnap. With penetration and cumshots and tears. Like real life!

This is Jennifer Garner at the premier of The Kingdom a new action film in which she plays an FBI agent. I haven’t seen it yet, but I plan to because nothing would make me happier than to see Jennifer Garner holding an MP5 submachine gun and screaming for cover fire. I miss Alias.

Links for you while I fire up my Alias Season 2 DVDs.

• Soxy Lady has the video of the dude that stole Cano’s hat at the Sox Yankees game the other night. Ow. (SoxyLady)
• Afro Jacks listed the phone numer to Mystery from VH1 and Jezebel interviewed him via sexy phone call. (Jezebel)
• Hot Haley from Clemson (Klemp-Son) U. in my home state is the cute college girl of the week. (CH)
• Vanessa Hudgens is a nude teenager who can’t figure out what Tyra Banks is saying. (yeeeah)
• Jaime Pressly looking MILFy after the baby… (Bastardly)
• Jennifer Ellison lives in a bikini (Jordan)
• Paris Hilton. Fuck it. I don’t have the energy. Just click.(Allie)
• 24 is actually going to happen some in this decade! (Seriously OMG)
• Cloe Sevigny is a beautiful angel. (City Rag)
• Heidi Montag and her huge rack do something musical. (IBBB)
• Britney allegedly hired and alleged hitman to allegedly kill KFED. Allegedly. (GoT)
• Ryan Seacrest failed as a host of the Emmys. YOU FAILED. (New Chatter)

Here’s Carmen Electra in New York for fashion week with 94% of her tits showing – which is 11% less than I would like to see. Also, I am apparently awesome at math. The reason I love girls like Carmen Electra is that they can do all the things slutty girls do but never get called slutty. Somehow they make it classy to be naked and sleep around with weirdos. It’s almost like being a dude, except one thing: nobody wants to motorboat  a dude’s rack.  True story.

Links if you made it this far.

• Lisa Rinna grabs her rack. I would too, but I’m on probation. (Drunken Stepfather)
• Cute College Girl of the week: Kaylan from StoneyBrook. (College Humor)
• Vanessa Hudgens might be the Girls Gone Wild whore hottie (Bumpshack)
• Jennifer Ellison in a bikini. (Jordan)
• Pamela Anderson and Kanye West did something somewhere (Bastardly)
• More Vanessa Hudgens photos (Notorious)
• Jessica Alba is a trooper. And she has a nice ass. (City rag)
• Shoot ‘em up won’t help you solve Fermat’s last theorum, but it will give an action boner that won’t quit. (Pajiba)
• Celebrity look-a-likes. (Allie)

This is Sophia Bush at the Teen Choice Awards sitting with other actors who play teens but aren’t really. Besides being the choice of 98% of all human life, Sophia was also the big winner at the Teen Choice awards with three awards.

Choice Movie Breakout: Female, Choice Movie Actress: Horror/Thriller for “The Hitcher” and Choice Movie Actress: Comedy for “John Tucker Must Die.” (source)

I guess teens are really stupid because one those movies came out like 2 years ago.  Also,  The Hitcher was Rated R so how did they even see the movie? Maybe they didn’t. Teenagers are known to be liars. Especially the two 17 yr. olds from the Catholic Girl’s School who said that they were at a party at my house when one of them got pregnant. It was a threesome duh, how do you know it was me?