NSFW – Fatback Media

Kapow. First it was the tube top and now short-shorts. Hayden Panettiere is hero of bringing back amazing fashion and she’s also a hero to smarmy, greasy fingered pervs all over the world. I know that last one is true because my server logs are pure filth. I get search queries for this site that would make a gangbang fetish whore stop the donkey and unzip her leather face mask to say, god damn that’s fucked up.

I’m talking to you especially, Mr. Feakydeaky dude with the Dubai IP address. That’s some crazy shit. We don’t do that here. I don’t even think that shit was legal in Sodom and Gomorrah. More Hayden Panettiere in short-shorts, but without any of that shit that dude in Dubai was looking for.

Fun Photography Fact: It looks like the photographer used a Fuji Quicksnap that he found in a muddy puddle for most of these. I’ve seen less grains in a bag of rice. Get it? See what I did there? It’s humor!

Links, for dat ass.

• The Hills is on DVD. I think this is the unrated version where they show full frontal. (Pop Bytes)
• Debra Messing is to fashion what my sack is to your chin. Her outfit doesn’t make sense either. (Yeeeah)
• Lisa Rinna and her big lips/tits at Staples for some reason. (IBBB)
• Angelina Jolie still has bisexual feelings, and is still perfectly alright by me. (Allie)
• Nicole Richie has a baby bump. Chick needs to eat some god damn sandwiches for that fetus. (Evil Beet)
• Guess who’s back in tha muthafucking house? Jesus, of course. With some upskirt action. (DS)
• Hot College girl: Nicci. With two c’s and Double D’s. (college humor)
• Hayden Panettiere eats ass. THAT’S IT! Dubai…click this shit. (Glunp)
• Olsen Twin thong action. (Seriously OMG)
• Britney is on the laxatives. Smooth move… (Gossip Mama)
• Amanda Bynes with legs up to there…for the pervs. (Bastardly)
• Paris and the dude from Entourage? (Gabsmash)
• Jessica Biel looks plain. Plain hot as hell! (Notorious)

Hayden Panetierre is a hero. A hero of the tube top blouse and by God, that’s a hero we can all trust with our lives. Besides being cute as a Chinese baby in teddy bear pajamas, she’s built like she could rip your spine out with one hand like the Predator. I like that unpredictability in a girl. Keeps things interesting. I know she’s 17, but in most states that makes her legal (to be fair most states really means Alabama and South Carolina) so it’s not pervy at all to think she’s hot in that tube top (assuming of course that you are in Alabama or South Carolina). So Roll Tide and Go Cocks.

Hayden Panetierre pumping gas folks. This is what it’s come to. A jail bait actress pumping gas at a Quiki Mart in LA is top shelf news today. Mundane images of actors are the new hotness. Bask. Bask. The gossip world will be turned on its diamonique studded pierced ear. Guaranteed, these shots will be on Extra and Access Hollywood tonight with riveting headlines like, Hollywood Teen Heroically Pumps Gas, or Hayden’s Heroism Fuels Car, or TV’s Hero is jailbate for 38 more months you pervs. Billy Bush will be all over this like Princess Di on a tunnel wall. I’m all over the headlines bitches, so eat the links.

• In the interest of fair balance, here’s an article about some hot dude. (Back Seat Cuddler)
• Demi Moore MILF-ing it up with some See Thru nipples. (Yeeeah)
• Lindsay Lohan puts the drugs and fun back into rehab. (Drunken Stepfather)
• Missy Peregrym is a hero. Who should be naked. That’s HEROIC. (Bastardly)
• Paris’ Car gets repo’s. What a poor bitch. (Celebitchy)
• More dude posts: Sting’s stinger for you ladies and any dudes that are into that shit. (Seriously OMG)
• Random hot naked chick at College Humor. (CH)

Katharine McPhee, who seems to only show up at events lately and doesn’t seem to be doing anything musical, still has a perfect rack. And that makes her my American Idol. Katherine McPhee is also a fan of Sanjaya Malakar, apparently:

“First of all, I think Sanjaya is an absolute phenomenon. Every year, there’s something that makes the show even bigger than it was the year before. I’m on the Sanjaya train! I’m like, ‘Go Sanjaya!’ “(source)

This is Katharine at the 9th Annual Young Hollywood Awards show; which seems to be more of a PR vehicle than an actual awards show. Wait that’s ALL AWARD SHOWS. Case in point, Kat McPhee received the “Exciting New Vocalist” award from Randy Jackson and Katharine Heigl received the “Superstar of Tomorrow” award from TR Knight. That’s like the time my mom gave me the coveted “best son in the world” award when I was 10. I got half of a 7-11 turkey sandwich, a pack of Fun Dip and a Big Gulp cup with “Best Son in the World” written on it in eyeliner pencil. Oh, and bus ticket to back to our home town that turned out to be a used lotto ticket with “bus ticket home” written on it in eyeliner pencil. That’s the last time I ever saw her.

• Taryn Manning scares the shit out of me. But I’m still hot for her. Does that make me creepy? (Bastardly)
• Morgan Fairchild got some big ass titties. She’s my wife. Yeah, that’s the ticket. (DS)
• Kevin Bacon would to like to be six degrees up in Hayden’s Panetierre. ZING! I’m a writer! (Glunp)
• Jennifer “call me Love” Hewitt sells underwear. Not hers though. I have most of those anyway. (IBBB)
• Jessica Biel + booty = ‘Nuff said. Shazam. (Yeeeah)
• Sienna Miller is desperate to be sperminated. Dibs! (Holly Scoop)
• Suri Cruise prepares for world domination. Resistance is futile, mutha fucka. (D-Listed)
• Bjork. What the Fjork? (Pop Bytes)
• Phil Stacey is the new Sanjaya. Rule. (Bumpshack)

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