NSFW – Fatback Media

The much discussed, but never expected sequel to The X-Files movies has finally gotten the green light. The first movie, which opened in 1998, continued the story line of FBI agents Mulder and Scully and their investigation of supernatural phenomena. After years of speculation and false starts it looks like the movie is finally going to get made.

Duchovny says, “This week, they’re starting some kind of road towards doing it (the film). Gillian and I both want to be in it now. We’re happy to do it.

“At this point all of the kind of fatigue and anxiety that we had towards the end of a nine-year run is gone.” (source)

Shows like 24 would never be what they are today without the X-Files. Also, I would not have an entire folder of Gillian Anderson nudes either. Coincidence? More like conspiracy. I tried to find some naked pics of Duchovny’s wife Tea Leoni, because she’s super hot. All I found was an old one of her with her nipple out but her teeth were all scary so I left it out. I guess that was back in the Ramen noodle days. These are some pics from Gillian’s new movie Straightheads in which she is apparently naked the whole time. There are plenty more salacious Scully’s in the archives, most are NSFW. Which is alien code for jerk material. Black oil rulez.

Thora Birch, who is currently filming the true crime flick, “The Winter of Frozen Dreams” in upstate NY, is getting some acting help on set from her well adjusted and not-crazy-at-all dad. On sex scenes. Normally sex scenes are shot on a closed set with only essential crew and the actors, but apparently Thora’s dad, Jack Birch feels that nude, simulated sex is a family affair.

The crew making “The Winter of Frozen Dreams” in upstate Schenectady was horrified when the father/manager of star lady Thora Birch insisted on watching the filming of her sex scenes with Dean Winters.

Jack Birch – who met Thora’s mother, Carol Connors, as her co-star in “Deep Throat” – demanded to be present as his daughter and Winters simulated intercourse last week.

“It was so wrong,” said one insider. “The director is saying, ‘Harder! Faster!’ and the father is giving Winters the thumbs up.”

Her dad, who “looks like Charles Manson” in a “full-length leather coat and wraparound sunglasses, even at night” – was described in a review of his “Road of Death” (1973) as “a muscle-stud . . . so unphotogenic you can’t take your eyes off him.”

Jack Birch was on the set every day giving orders – even telling director Eric Mandelbaum where to place his camera so that Thora would look her best. Mandelbaum was about to shoot the first sex scene Monday when, “all of a sudden, the front door is being kicked in. Her father was threatening to kill the assistant directors. Then he threatens to pull her from the movie with three days of shooting left.”

Making matters worse, a problem with the focus on the camera necessitated 14 takes.

“It was the most bizarre, perverse scene,” said our witness. “One girl on the crew broke down crying.”(source)

Thora Birch is cute-hot and has an amazing rack. That’s the end of the non-creepy part of this story. Her parents were porn stars, her dad dresses like a serial killer and urges actors to ram his daughter in sex scenes. (Big boobs, porn star parents, daddy issues. Tramp trifecta!) That’s the kind of thing that can get you a Hallmark filled with Anthrax in my neighborhood. The good news is that she’s probably a whore. So that counts for something. Here’s some jerk material for her dad. PS. The one that looks fake was taken on my yacht. I’m rich.

Lena Headey, who plays Queen Gorgo in the new movie 300, may be a good reason to buy a ticket. You may be thinking, “But hey dude, I went to History class, I remember the battle of Thermopylae, don’t they all die?” The answer is yes. Yes they all die. And the “good guy”, King Leonidas is completely humiliated and beheaded and his head is kicked around the town for all to laugh at. GREAT FUCKING STORY. Right? Kinda that sheep’s stomach filled pie of haggis-y awesomeness known as Braveheart. Great flick. Except for the part about, EVERYBODY FUCKING DYING. If I want to see reality, I’ll just turn on CNN and cry myself to sleep again. Where was I?

Oh yeah. Lena Headey is naked for most of the movie. Or at least she should be. Nothing smooths over a shitty ending like gratuitous nudity. In case you’re wondering, Lena is the actress who played Angelika the German chick with the Scottish accent, in the Brothers Grimm (you know the DVD that’s in your mailbox from Netflix) because that’s how accurate that movie was. More precisely…nudity!

Emma Watson, who was reportedly considering leaving the role of Hermoine is the successful Harry Potter film series, may be staying in her role after all.

“We’re extremely confident that Emma will be back for films six and seven,” a spokesperson for the Hollywood studio told CBBC’s Newsround.

The statement comes amid speculation that the 16-year-old told the company she did not want to continue.

Filming for Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince is scheduled to begin this year, with a release date at some point in 2008.

A release date in 2010 has been mooted for the seventh and final movie, The Deathly Hallows – the year Watson will turn 20. (source)

Obviously, I’m kidding about the whore part. She’s only 16, and I’m not one of those creepy stalkers who’s into to young, nubile, witchy girls with cute little accents and a sassy attitude. That’s just gross. And against my parole conditions. Besides she’ll be 18 soon enough. Only 393 days, baby! (Now sing this for the rest of the day sukkahs: You’re much too young girl…)