Damn it feels good to be a gangster…

Sorry about the delay folks, but all the sites that I rip off read and appreciate with reverence, have been a little slack about posting. Also, I was drunk on Mojitos and sitting on a beach with a girl with frog tattoo on her ass. Dios Mio! What I noticed about the people on the islands is that they’re very accommodating, they’re usually hot and are great at finding good places to dump a body if you have cash. Side note: the beach is not one of those places. What I also noticed this weekend is that Melissa Joan Hart is back to fighting weight and is looking mighty MILFy, in a witchy sort of way. I love freckles. Explain that, Clarissa. LINKS!

• Speaking of Nickleodeon, Hayden Panetierre is doing her best all grow’d up look. So click it, perv. (Bastardly)
• Courtney Love bikini pics. You’d hit it, don’t lie. Like I lied about your sister. (DS)
• P.Diddy banged Sienna Miller. I wonder if he did it Mandingo style and had Jude Law watch? (Yeeeah)
• Jenna  Jameson had surgery on her box and it’s all fucked up now. Because it was so pristine and supple before. (Celebrity Smack)
• Blades of glory sucked. You know what doesn’t? Jenna Fischer’s rack. (Pajiba)

American Idol is getting a new judge. Amidst rumors that vehemently crazy dingdong Paula Abdul may be getting fired, Courtney Love has officially announced that she will be a judge on the hit reality show this season.

Love reveals to her favorite magazine Web site that Idol’s executive producer Nigel Lythgoe called her office last week inquiring into whether she would be interested in sitting in as a judge on the hit FOX show.

“He called,” Love tells Usmagazine.com. “He was wondering if I was interested. I thought it was kind of weird but brilliant.” (source)

Another source from the catacombs under my house revealed that Nigel Lythgoe is actually Lord Voldemort and that this is all part of his deadly endgame. Asking Courtney Love to judge a singing contest makes about as much sense as asking her not to eat buckets of drugs or be a hideous hag who won’t stop unfurling her vagina parts in front of live audiences.

There was a time when Courtney Love was pretty hot and damn right do-able. Wait. I mean, OH MY GOD DON’T HURT ME. I tried to find some non-crazy images of Courtney Love, but after about 9 seconds Googling I went fucking insane and killed my neighbor with a can of anchovies packed in olive oil. To be fair, he was kind of a dick. I need a nap because my eyes are burning with the flames of hellfire.

UPDATE: So Apparently that whole coversations was a demon whispering in her ear and not an American Idol rep.  Stupid demon.