NSFW – Fatback Media

How the hell did I let Christmas sneak up on me like this? I need to get out do some shopping for all the supermodels in my life. Here are some sexy Monday links to get you in the mood for some internet shopping on-the-job. You’re such a little sneaker.

• Maria Menounos zips her way into the Spike TV Video Game Awards (Bastardly)
• Kristin Cavallari signs autographs at Kohl’s. Huh? (Bricks and Stones)
• Christmas boobies! (College Humor)
• Brad and Angelina have a House Party Frank LLoyd Wright style, yo! (Yeeeah)
• Jesus has the best links ever. (Drunken Stepfather)
• Prince is going to play the Superbowl Halftime show. (Glitterati)
• Tyra Banks avoids the nip slip. (Subvert Society)
• Kristin Bell wants you to save the boobies. (Celebutaint)

Here are a few older images of Michell Monaghan at the Kiss Kiss Bang Bang Premier.

It’s Tuesday lunch and here’s what’s going on around the web.

Kristin Cavallari may play Daisy Duke in the new prequel film The Inbred Dukes of Hazzard have sex with their cousin Daisy: The early Years. (I’m not Obsessed)

Paris Hilton is being sued for the car crash she caused. Unfortunately, she will not pay a dime because she is an entitled rich bitch who has never paid for a thing in her life. Bitch. (TMZ)

Jeenifer Aniston tried to call Brad Pitt to “congratulate him” but his called was refused. Translation: Jennifer Aniston can’t let go and was using the call to Brad to cause trouble. Angelina fielded the call and and smacked Brad Pitt in the face with the phone further emasculating him. (Bricks and Stones)

Denise Richards: WILF. Figure it out. (Star Power)

Shannen Doherty is getting her own reality show on Lifetime called Breaking Up With Shannen Doherty. If it was called Breaking Chairs Over Shannen Dougherty, I’d probably watch it. (Glitterati) . (PS. Glad you’re back Tina…)

The Entourage recap is online at GMMR. Still haven’t seen one god damn episode. Am I missing something? (GMMR)

Jessica Alba hangs out with her ex after the MTV Movie Awards.(The Bastardly)

The kid from A Christmas Story who shot his eye out is still alive and he’s in The Break Up with Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston. (ICYDK)

So finally after like 17 months of pregnancy in a third world country while running from lions, monkeys and Tse-Tse flies, Angelina Jolie has had her baby. The baby is named Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt.

Brad Pitt cut the umbilical cord of his new daughter when she was born.

The actor was in the delivery room when his partner Angelina Jolie delivered the girl, who they have named Shiloh Nouvel, via Caesarean section in a private hospital in Namibia on Saturday (27.05.06).

Pitt, like many new dads, was offered the chance to cut the cord – the lifeline which joins mother and baby – by medical staff and reportedly jumped at the chance.(source)

What’s amazing is that The Jolie-Pitts have donated 300K to the literally starving country of Namibia as they leave the press spectacle behind them. It’s nice to see that imperialism is still alive on the “Dark Continent”. I mean, what kind of world would this be if we couldn’t rough it in a third world country – taking no heed to local mores, customs, or laws – use up the local resources to our own benefit then laugh as we throw money out of the car window at the urchins on our way out of town? A sad world indeed, my friends.

And Shiloh Nouvel? ‘What’s your porn name?’ is probably not the best way to name your kids although I’ve done pretty well with Smokey Longpole. Thanks, mom!