NSFW – Fatback Media

Newsflash: Nicole is still skinny. Except now she might be not eating for two. Rumors are stirring that Nicole might be preggers.

Richie recently underwent a series of tests, including blood and urine screenings, reports Life and Style, which reports that the tests “confirmed she is pregnant.”

Richie’s rep didn’t respond to requests for comment from either L&S or The Scoop, but on May 30, the star was photographed at a reproductive clinic, and the mag quotes an “insider” as saying, “Nicole’s determined to get healthy for her own sake and the baby’s.” (source)

How is that even physiologically possible? I’m pretty sure in order to carry a baby, you need to have some percentage of body fat and Nicole’s -7% isn’t cutting it. Furthermore, who the fuck could be coked-out, booze saturated and/or have received enough blunt force trauma to bang that bag of bones?

Well, if she is pregnant then the baby could theoretically survive by eating Nicole’s entrails until it finally just rips its way out and goes after Ripley. Ease down, you’re just grinding transaxle.

UPDATE: The NY Post says she’s a fat fatty.