NSFW – Fatback Media

Paris Hilton is caged heat, baby. Well she would have been if she wasn’t a spoiled bitch and this weren’t LA. She would’ve ended up some teardrop tattooed, East LA gangsta chick’s little skinny shank toy, (like Mesquita tried to make Reese Witherspoon in Freeway), but it turns out that heiresses get special treatment – even in jail. I have avoided writing about Paris Hilton, because the last thing the world needs is another blog post about Paris Hilton. But. She’s in jail for breaking the law and that’s kinda cool symmetry. Oh, she gets her own cell, she got to come in early and gets to watch tv and all, but she’s still in prison and that’s sublime.

Ah I could go on and on about this, but my Mortimer Ichabod Marker pen and I have some work to do. The new Chess hotties were just released! Check and mate… Here are the top links for Paris Hilton in Jail.

• Paris Hilton mug shots. (IDLYITW)
• Paris Hilton cries on the way to prison where she belongs. (WWTDD)
• Nicky Hilton prepares her defense of Paris. Voire dire is gonna rock. (Yeeeah)
• This is not Paris Hilton. This is Jessica Biel kissing a chick. (DS)
• Paris Hilton turns herself in to the police. (SeriouslyOMGWTF)
• Paris Hilton in jail. Break. Josie Maran Minute. (Bastardly)
• Heidi Montag’s tits at the MTV Awards. (Celebrity Hubris)
• Paris wore hair extensions to jail. Nappy. (ICYDK)
• What’s your gossip IQ? Mine is elevety billion. I win again! (Radar)
• Kim Kardashian goes bodonkadonkdonk. (GoT)

Here are the hottest pictures of Paris Hilton I could find: