NSFW - Fatback Media

Britney Spears’ ex husband of a several hours, Jason Alexander (not Constanza!) is reportedly telling the press that Britney’s drug use (and abuse) goes back to before and during the couple’s short lived marriage.

Alexander, who claims he once had a drug-fueled threesome with Spears and a female dancer, said that in their short relationship he had trouble keeping up with her drug use.

“We used ecstasy at night to party and cocaine during the day to stay awake,” Alexander said. “Then we would take downers like Valium or Vicodin to come down and rest.

“She definitely had a problem with drugs when we were together and that was three years ago.”

He claims Spears almost had a fatal overdose on “MDMA,” or pure ecstasy, while they partied in a Las Vegas club. He said he sneaked her up to their hotel suite and she was sweating and having problems breathing.

“I took her into the bathroom and threw her in the shower,” Alexander said. “She was unconscious. She tripped and fell. I was trying to hold her up and speak to her. She wasn’t moving.

“I remember looking down at her all crumpled in the tub with the water coming down. She looked so white and lifeless. I thought she was dead. I thought, ‘This bitch is going to fucking die right here in front of me.’” (source)

God damn.

She went from the Mickey Mouse club to Drug Store Cowboy before she even finished high school. Wait. Did she even finish high school? I could blame Britney, but she’s just the product of an overzealous stage mom trying to vicariously supplant memories of awkward teen years - in the back seat of too many 4×4’s - at the hands of fumbling varsity boys but she never got  be more than the practice girl. The only difference between Britney Spears and John Benet Ramsey is that someone saved John Benet the trouble of someday diving off the roof of an LA hi-rise after 6 days of speedballing, rough anal and hesitation cuts. Fly on Freebird.

I feel for Jason Alexander though. There’s nothing worse than trying to figure what to do with a body when you still have all that coke left, the Valiums have just kicked in and you just realized THAT YOU’RE THE DEVIL. Best to sleep a couple of hours and figure it out in the morning.