NSFW – Fatback Media

This is unbelievably perfect model Marissa Miller who, according to IMDB is 28 years old. But how can that be you ask? Twenty eight in human years is like a hundred and eleventy in model years. She should have a collapsed nostril, anal fistulas and only weigh 43 lbs by now. She was either created by aliens to destroys us, or, if the voices I’ve been hearing are right, the Lord wants me to masturbate a lot more. She’s 5′8″, 34D-23-35, is from southern California and came in second in the Kelly Slater Invitational Surf Contest in Fiji. And that’s only because Kelly Slater was masturbating to her while surfing and got in her way. Granted, she didn’t surf. She just walked down to the water in a bikini and said mahalo and entire island of Fiji rubbed one out right then and there. True story. That’s why she’s such an inspiration.