Jessica Simpson will burn in hell
Jessica Simpson and her sister Ashlee are destined for the fires of hell according to a Baptist minister who is lashing out at them for using sex to sell their records. Reverend Bob Harrington is publicly chastising the girls and their father for turning away from their religion for profits.
“Their father has replaced his faith in the Lord with the love of money, which is the root of all evil. He has replaced holiness with horniness,” the Sun quoted the holy man, as saying.
“They don’t represent American standards and certainly not Christian standards,” he added.
The religious leader has also used harsh words for the Dukes Of Hazzard star’s most prized possession - her over-sized boobs. He has said their boobs would end up drooping as punishment for their sins.
“Jessica and Ashlee will reap the dismal crops they are sowing. Their breasts will sag and their faces will wither and they will be left with nothing but a hollow shell,” said the priest. (source)
I think the fires of hell will welcome them both, with fiery open arms. Somehow, I picture this guy looking like the creepy dude in the black hat from Poltergeist 2. I’m not sure how comfortable I would feel going to church with him as the preacher. Of course, Sunday mornings in my house were spent watching my mom cry to the 700 Club because my newest “uncle” took off before breakfast and stole her smokes. Sinner.
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Posted in Ashlee Simpson, Dane Cook, Jessica Simpson, Religion |
Written by Fatback on September 20, 2006 – 8:55 am
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