Jessica Simpson, Nick Lachey Divorce Settlement is Close
Jessica Simpson has reportedly called Nick Lachey out with an insultingly lowball offer for their divorce settlement. California Law (as with most other states) requires that all marital assets not covered by a pre-nuptual agreement be divided equally between the two parties.
Multiple sources connected with the former couple tell TMZ that Simpson has offered Lachey less than $1.5 million to settle the division of property. Under California law, Lachey would be entitled to half of what the couple earned during their marriage. The Associated Press reports that in 2004 alone, Simpson raked in $30 million.
We’re told that Simpson’s reps believe that Lachey will fold because he does not want to make it appear that he is after her money. They also know that Lachey is still in love with his estranged wife and believe he does not have the stomach to square off with her in court. (source)
Jessica also reportedly said that Nick Lachey is a god damn pussy and that he needs to take the bullshit settlement and then he should come right over and wash her feet because they are sore, but he needs to stop at the vet to pick up her dog who just had his anal glands lanced, and then stop at Costco and get her some tampons – but not the variety pack though – the last time he went, he got the fucking variety pack and he knows that she needs the super flow. God damn is it that fucking hard? Maybe if he were a real man…
Nick, like many before him, was fooled into a relationship with a high maintenance, needy bitch by a giant rack and the promise of hitting the trail on the road less traveled, if you will. Now that it’s over, Nick needs to grow a set and realize that he is in the catbird seat in this situation. The best revenge for putting up with a high maintenance chick like Jessica Simpson is taking her money and banging her sister and her best friend.
So far there are 3 SEXY COMMENTS » What do you think, sugar?
Posted in Cacee Cobb, Jessica Simpson, Nick Lachey |
By Fatback
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3 Comments to “Jessica Simpson, Nick Lachey Divorce Settlement is Close”
June 1st, 2006 at 12:18 pm
[...] – Jaime Pressly Gallery – SIZZLER: Brangelina Coming Home – The Brangelina Code – Jessica Simpson, Nick Lachey Divorce Settlement is Close [...]
November 22nd, 2006 at 1:43 pm
Fatback,
Most states DO NOT divide assets 50/50, or as community property. In fact, there are only 10 states that have community property laws on the books, and Alaska, as the 10 state with such laws, has a plan that a couple must opt into.
Instead, most states have what’s called Equitable Distribution, where the judge in considering many factors, decides what a fair division of assets would be. Some consider who’s at fault in the divorce, and all consider factors like length of marriage, the needs of each spouse, and what seems fair overall. Apparently, the split is something like 2/3 to 1/3 in favor of the higher wage earner, but not always.
I just thought you’d like to know.
November 23rd, 2006 at 7:40 am
Thanks dude. Or should I call you esquire? That’s why this site rocks. People like you who know shit about the law and like to look at boobies. It’s a deadly combination. Back on track though, isn’t CA a 50/50 state?