NSFW - Fatback Media

Pete Doherty, who has absolutely no reason to breath our air, got arrested again this week for drug possession. I don’t think I could be less surprised unless Paris Hilton was found with her mouth around a diseased Greek cock- on camera.

LONDON - Babyshambles frontman Pete Doherty was arrested Thursday, hours after a court appearance on drugs possession, according to media reports.

Police said a 27-year-old man was stopped in east London just after 2 p.m. by plainclothes officers and arrested on suspicion of possession of drugs with intent to supply. They did not name the man arrested, but the British Broadcasting Corp. reported it was Doherty.

Earlier, Judge Jane McIvor had ordered Doherty to attend an 18-month drug rehabilitation program, placed him on two years’ probation and banned him from driving for six months because of drugs possession.(source)

Wow. Drugs? No. Drugs? Really? No. Drugs? Why do they even arrest him in the first place? They pop him for possession and he uses his one phone call to score coke for when he makes bail. “Roight, Ka’e. Bring th’stuff ’round in about phree ‘owers to me flat, luv. Oi, I’m in the clink, right? Fockin’ coppers. S’all barney, in’it? Jus’ fockin’ doo it, right?”

I hate to get all medieval on you today, but who will rid us of this meddlesome [bastard]? I can’t say what the fuck enough about this. But, what the fuck? For reals. What the fuck is with this guy? I can’t believe that he can walk down the street unscathed with that face. If I saw him in public I would spontaneously bludgeon him to death all 28 Days Later style. Totally involuntary reaction to his proximity. I don’t even think it’s a crime. It’s biological, man. Hypothalamus shit. I had to take two rohypnols just to stop myself from clawing the LCD screen from my laptop as I wrote this. Which sucks because, how am I going to let chicks date rape me if I’m out of roofies?

I rarely ever throw around my weight as an internet super star but if someone will beat him senseless and pay a homeless person to ass rape him with a broken Mad Dog 20/20 bottle I will give you a Fatback and Collards T-Shirt. For real.

Disclaimer: Not that I’m worried about Pete having a lawyer or anything, but that was obviously not a real incitement of violence towards him. I mean, it’s not like he’d be hanging around the Thames Magistrate Court in London for his arraignment or anything so I wouldn’t look there at all. Peace is the answer. Oi.