NSFW - Fatback Media

An Iowa man is now facing several felony charges, including kidnapping and child pornography, but that’s not the most bizarre part of this case. My colleague and super soul sistah KS at AllThisNonsense.com had the lead and The Smoking Gun has all the deets.

Travis Frey, a 33-year-old Iowa man who is facing charges that he
tried to kidnap his own wife (not to mention a separate child
pornography rap). Frey, prosecutors contend, apparently is a rather
demanding guy. In fact, he actually drew up a bizarre four-page
marriage document–a "Contract of Wifely Expectations"–that sought to
establish guidelines for his spouse in terms of hygiene, clothing, and
sexual activities.

Travis goes into great detail in his so-called contract which comes off as a very legal-ese sounding document. Here are some of Travis’ most eloquent points:

• On hygiene and personal maintenance- "You will shave every third day. Includes , underarms, chest, legs, pubic area (navel to anus). All areas are to be completely clean shaven…"
• On clothing- "You will only wear thigh highs and garters and only thong panties…"
• On Sleepwaer and sleeping- "….You will naked and in the bed withing 20 minutes of the kids being in bed, and then sleep naked unless otherwise instructed..."

It goes on and on and on. What really struck me, aside from this guy’s obvious extensive legal training, was his choice of fonts for this document. The first page starts of with a Geneva style font which is a good choice. Legible. Wide. Easily parsed by the eye. But on page 2 he really drives his point home by using the Kama Sutra Porn Font. Very classy, yet still eloquently making his point. Almost as if even his typography is saying, "Bitch, I own you". Nice. By page three he switches to Title Case with the Kama Sutra Font and never looks back. To wit:

Click the image to enlarge:

Honestly, I don’t see what all the fuss is about. This guy is obviously a strapping young man who is just trying to make sure his wife doesn’t get out of pocket and embarrass him. He can’t have his wife going to dinner parties and telling her girlfriends that she can just come and go as she pleases. That is the fodder for anarchy. Like my daddy used to say to me," Son, what do you say to a woman with two black eyes?…Nothing. You already told her twice!". Chivalry is not dead.