Angelina Jolie is finally admitting she is Pregnant
In the no-shit-sherlock news event of the year, Angelina Jolie is pregnant. Really? Nooo. Really, for reals? Well, no shit. You know, I hate to beat a dead horse but I’m pretty sure we have all known that for weeks. In fact, my homie KS over at AllThisNonsense.com broke this story from a super secret and reliable source weeks ago; even though some of our elders would have you believe differently. I even added my own spin to the whole situation shortly thereafter. But no harm no foul right? Much love to our betters. Here’s what People magazine had to say:
Angelina Jolie, 30, is expecting a baby this summer with Brad Pitt, 42,
PEOPLE reports in its latest issue. "Yes, I’m pregnant," Jolie said
Monday, shortly after arriving in the Dominican Republic. She is there
filming The Good Shepard with Matt Damon and is working with the charity Yele Haiti. Jolie and Pitt are already the parents of Maddox, 4, and Zahara, 1.
I just wonder how the natural child will be treated compared to the adopted children. Because you know how that works. Once little ‘Aryan’ gets older, Brad and Angelina will start to favor him more and more. Pretty soon Maddox and Zahara are wearing uniforms and cleaning up after Master Jolie-Pitt and living in the attic telling each other stories of what it will be like when their real mommies and daddies, who are undoubtedly princes and princesses, come back to rescue them. They’ll come back one day, Maddie! I just know it! It’s okay Zahara…have you ever seen a unicorn cry?
Oh yeah, just so I don’t get my inbox flooded with hatemail. I am, uh…happy for them or something.
"Assuredly we bring not innocence not the world, we
bring impurity much rather: that which purifies us is trial, and trial
is by what is contrary." - John Milton.
UPDATE: The effervescently sexy gals over at Glitterati Gossip are reporting that AJ is due in May, which means she got pregnant last fall, which is what I have been saying all along.
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By Fatback
3 Comments to “Angelina Jolie is finally admitting she is Pregnant”
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January 11th, 2006 at 8:15 pm
Dear Mr. “Fatback”,
Thank you so much for confirming what we have seemed to have known for weeks. We all suspected that she was knocked up, but thanks to your excellent journalism, we have seen the official photos.
January 11th, 2006 at 8:37 pm
Thanks Ladies…I had to edit the salutation to protect the not-so-innocent!
January 11th, 2006 at 10:03 pm
I was wondering the same thing. I foresee M. and Z. writing a book someday.