White Trash
Leighton Meester Born As Caged Heat
Sep 3rd
Star Magazine is reporting that 22 yr old southern hottie Leighton Meester’s IMDB profile may be a bit fudged. Star says that Leighton was actually born in a Texas jail (where her mom was doing time for drug running) and not in Marco Island Florida like her bio reports. From Star:
Leighton Meester, who plays the privileged Blair Waldorf in the hot TV series, was born while her mother was serving a federal prison sentence in Texas. The mom was allowed to stay in a halfway house for the birth, but had to return to prison on the day Leighton turned three months. The future star was raised by a relative while mom served out her sentence for her role in a major drug-running ring.
None of those details appear in the actress’ bio, which falsely lists the young star as being born in Marco Island, Fla., where her parents moved in the late ’80s.
And Leighton’s mom isn’t the only member of her family with a record — her father, grandfather and aunt all did hard time in federal prisons for drug dealing! (STAR)
So her whole family is in the Dixie Mafia. Which means her sexiness just went up 1000%, but so did your chance of ending up at the bottom of a well with your head and fingers cut off if you date her. Hey y’all!
Jaime Lynn Spears Has A Stalker
Jun 6th
A photographer has been arrested for allegedly stalking Jamie Lynn Spears and Casey Aldridge (better known as the guy who is being passed off as the real father of Jamie Lynn’s baby).
Edwin W. Merino, 30, of Los Angeles, posted bond Tuesday. He is scheduled to appear in court next week.
Authorities in Liberty, a small town in southwest Mississippi near the Louisiana border, said Merino wouldn’t leave the pregnant Spears and her fiance, Casey Aldridge, alone. (Yahoo News)
He’s a paparazzo. Isn’t it his job to stalk people? I think the real crime here is the lack of social programs and aid for the indigent in the deep south. And also, how good my ass looks in these new Diesel Jeans. Rreeow.
Here’s some pics of Jamie Lynn Spears before she got pregnant, because pregnant teens creep me out. I’m running out of aliases ladies.
Britney Spears is Really Smart
Aug 22nd
Britney Spears has left executives at her label, Jive Records, stunned after she backed out of a Timbaland produced duet with ex-boyfriend Justin Timberlake. The song, which the label hoped would serve as the comeback Britney is looking for, was to be performed at this years VMA’s. Sources can offer no explanation other than Britney Spears is a fucking retard:
“Timbaland set aside a week out of his crazy schedule to do this – and then, just before she was supposed to fly out, Britney abruptly canceled the session and refused to do the song. “It’s crazy,” the insider added. “She’s looking for a comeback, and this would have not only been a huge hit, but something she could have opened the MTV Video Awards with and really blown everyone away.” Another insider said, “Listen, everyone is worried. In her mind, her album is done and she’s done enough work . . . She’s an easy target right now, because she’s . . . sick. People like her are sick. It’s like an anorexic who’s sick in the head and needs help. She needs help. It’s sad because what she’s got – and we’ve heard it’s like bipolar disorder – can easily be treated with medication, but she won’t do it.”
Of course Britney was going to fuck this up. It’s Britney. She’s probably recorded 12 songs about cigarettes and pie. And Slim Jims. It’s pretty safe to say that I’d rather listen to firetrucks at an orphanage than anything on this idiot’s album.
Britney driving in LA without her wig, makeup, or sanity:
Britney’s comeback will probably look a little something like this.
K-Fed, Super Dad
Aug 14th
In an interesting turn of events, K-Fed is giving Britney a good kick in the balls she’s grown. Don’t tell me she doesn’t have them. Any chick who shaves her head has a set hidden somewhere.
K-Fed Up should be his new moniker. He is sick and tired of his Ex’s stupidity and believes the kids would be better off with him. I say, good for him. Take your kids from the crazy bitch! Cracking into cars, giving the paparazzi crotch shots (which Fatback loves, ya know), and doing only god knows what the fuck all else, surely isn’t the example you want for your kids.
I never thought I would see the day when I thought K-Fed was a stand up parent, but hey, hell does freeze over occasionally it seems. ‘Course he could just be in it for the money.
As we first reported, K-Fed is going back to court asking for more custody of the kids. Federline just agreed to a 50/50 split. Then, he turned around almost immediately and filed papers asking for 70/30. So why such a sudden change of heart? (source)
It sucks that even in today’s courts you have judges who think the mother is the perfect one for the kids. Not so. Plenty of hot men out there who are excellent fathers. No, I have no clue what the fuck their hotness has to do with it, but damn, I like me some beefalicious daddy.
Alright, catch you later, got to recharge the batteries to the Venus. 
These aren’t new, but neither is Britney Spears’ Schadenfruede.
