Spencer Pratt
Spencer Pratt Chose Fame Over Heidi (HUH?)
Jul 19th
"God, I love me..."
Apparently, Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag have gotten a divorce and holyfuckinshit, I don’t care. Divorce? NOFUCKINGWAY! Was it mental cruelty? Irreconcilable differences? Adultry? Potted meat? Sodomize me with information, PEOPLE:
“We love each other but I’m a famewhore and I’ll never grow out of it,” Pratt tells PEOPLE. “[Heidi] knows that and doesn’t want that.”
“I want every kind of press,” he says. “She believes in bad press. There’s no way my love for fame and her love for puppies will ever work out successfully. She just wants to hike and hang out and be calmer.”
As for their infamous “Speidi,” moniker, Pratt says his estranged wife “doesn’t want to be Speidi anymore. She wants to be Heidi Montag: the sex symbol.” [Triple D titties have that effect-Fatback]
Don’t count this badmotherfingerer out though. Spencer loves it when a plan comes together…like in that one show that time. Here’s more from the vox populi, emphasis mine.
When fighting cyber crime fell through, [Whaaa...?- F.] Pratt says he decided to grow a beard and turn to art. “I’m switching it up,” he says. “I’ve already gone for the blonde, spiky-haired look. Now I’m going for the Hollywood producer look.”
Continues Pratt: “I’m an artist now. I have an easel and everything. I’m going for an art show and a gallery.”
I’m assuming that this quote was taken while Spencer Pratt sat in a kiddie pool of crystal meth. He went on to say that, he’s “pretty sure he’s a lock for that CIA clandestine services job on their career page, and also have you seen Michelle Obama’s ass? Tell me I never have to leave this room! Sweet.” Hey Spencer, here are some pictures of your ex-wife failing at nudity. Also, she’ll be fucking other dudes soon. Paint a pony for me!
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- “God, I love me…”
Speidi Dresses as Jon and Kate
Oct 30th
Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are going all the way for Halloween this week and new they could steal the headlines back from Jon and Kate Gosselin by dressing up as them. I personally think this is a hysterical costume idea and the fact that they are lugging over a dozen baby dolls with them makes the costumes even funnier.
But seriously, they may be peering into their future. They are married and what most people do after they get married is have kids but I guess they are both too big of attention whores to give attention to another small life in this world. However, Heidi has said in the past that not only does she want kids some day but that she actually wants to have multiple kids. If they fuck around and use in vitro fertilization then they may just have sextuplets like Kate Gosselin. Big props to Speidi for this costume idea. It may be topped on Halloween eve but I am giving them the costume of the year so far.
Spencer Pratt= Bad Husband
Sep 3rd
Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag are arguably the happiest couple in Hollywood. And they make that very clear for every photographer that follow them all over the world. But there is a limit to their happiness. Spencer Pratt is now saying that if Heidi gets pregnant, it’s divorce time.
This is probably the best news I have heard in a long time because now there is a chance, there is a possibility, that Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt a.k.a. Speidi might not be together forever. He says, ” I’m a baby. I’m not prepared. And I’m not sure the world wants a Spencer Pratt spawn.” He is right on the money there. I don’t want a Spencer Pratt spawn or more importantly I do not want another Heidi Montag clone running around this planet. I could say something nice about Heidi Montag but she decided to keep her clothes on, or at least her privates covered in a recent issue of Playboy so she will not be getting any positive press from me. Fucking prude.
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Links that have a large brood
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Rumor Willis says she’ll get naked. Noooooooooooooooo!- Celeb News Wire
Cute college girl of the day- College Humor
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Heidi Montag, or Pratt, or Whatever Was Hospitalized
Jun 8th
Heidi Montag has finally got in over her head with her attention whoring ways. She was rushed to a Coasta Rican hospital over the weekend after enduring a challenge on the NBC show I’m A Celebrity…Get Me Out Of Here. I am guessing the show will air tonight, but NBC is being coy about the fact that Speidi is back on the show or not.
Heidi was locked in something called the Lost Chamber and was not allowed out, according to Us magazine, a couple of days. Afterwards Heidi was rushed to the hospital and had to have an IV put in her. I wonder where they stuck it? Hehe. I know I am perverted. Anyway, this is probably the most serious trip Heidi has taken to the hospital since she had to have her tonsils removed when she was 12. NBC is claiming they did not torture her, and Heidi is thinking about leaving the show. But once that voice in her head says “ATTENTION, ATTENTION, ATTENTION” she will reconsider and will endure just about anything to prolong her 15 minutes of fame.
Links that never leave the woods
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Britney Spears is topless- notorious news
Jessica Alba is a dumpster diver- Celeb News Wire
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Cute college girl of the day- College Humor
Kelly Brook voted sexiest body and breasts- Holy Moly
Avril Lavigne is still alive- I Don’t Want Your Life
Leona sings. Whoever that is- Allie Is Wired
