Rihanna sat down to do an interview with Diane Sawyer today. She actually had the interview a couple of days ago but it aired today. She basically said that Chris Brown had abused her many times before but she kept coming back because of love. Pathetic. First of all it is probably a good thing she clung to him as long as she had because Rihanna is not much to look at. That is just my humble opinion.

This abuse horse has been beaten to death by both Rihanna and Chris. Hell even Oprah got involved in the mix. My guess is that every time someone brings up the subject of domestic abuse Rihanna will get a real serious look on her face and maybe even swell up a few crocodile tears because her 15 minutes of fame are up and she wants to stay in the press. All the fucked up hair styles and sunglasses in the world are not going to make you relevant Rihanna. I expect this shit to hang in the headlines for the next year.

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Today is a landmark day in the Chris Brown assault trial. Rihanna will be in court and it is expected for her to be a good civilian, and victim, and testify against that little bitch Chris Brown. But it is clear that she can not be forced to testify. Even if she refuses to testify, Mark Geragos, Chris Brown’s attorney, may be able to get a pretty decent plea deal.

The whole goal of the Chris Brown legal team is to avoid jail time altogether. I suppose it doesn’t really matter if he goes to the clink or not. His career is over and there isn’t a snowballs chance in hell that he will ever record with a talented artist or anyone big in “the business” again. However, I heard that there is an opening for human punching bag at the local anger management class. He should look into it.

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Last week the internet was all abuzz with nude photos of Cassie Ventura. About one day after the second Cassie nude photo leaked, showing her pierced vag, or hell it might have been the same day, nude photos of Rihanna leaked onto the internets. I preferred the Cassie ones better because I just don’t think Rihanna is a 100% hotty.

Now that the photos have leaked, Rihanna’s lawyers have done a half assed job at trying to get cease and desist orders to all the big name entertainment blogs. People are speculating that the photos are not just a coincidence. That they were leaked by the same people. And according to one site, more pics are soon to come. Including Jennifer Lopez, Christina Millian and one set I would die happily if I never saw, Jamie Foxx.

If a J-Lo nude pic leaks onto the net, especialy one showing off that big gorgeous rump of hers, I will die from an orgasm overdose.

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Rihanna may be famous for something more than her vocals. According to Star magazine Chris Brown has recorded a sex tape with her and he is thinking about releasing it to the public. I seem to be an expert in celebrity sex tapes so if this thing comes to surface I am willing to bet my left nut that it will be bought by Red Light Productions and it will sell for anywhere between $15- $20 million.

This, just like Paris Hilton and Pamela Anderson is a sex tape that I would definitely buy. I didn’t bother with the Kim Kardashian sex tape because it is about 45 minutes of some black dude getting a BJ. If this sex tape ever does surface, which is doubtful, then it would probably get all of Rihanna’s songs pulled from Radio Disney. But who knows. They still play that Cheetah Girls shit after a booty shot from one of the girl surfaced on the internet. And Vanessa Anne Hudgens is still being played on that station even though she posed nude for a picture intended for Zac Efron leaked onto the internet. I don’t know why I am talking about Disney. Probably because it is more likely that they will play Rihanna’s Umbrella 3 times this day instead of the porno hitting the net in the next 3 years.

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Links that haven’t had sex in a decade

Barack Obama fucked up on Leno- IDLYITW

Meet Tyra Banks- IBBB

The Fast And The Furious 4 is gonna kick ass- Holy Moly

Avril Lavigne dresses like a 13 year old- Drunken Stepfather

Natalie Imbruglia is still slammin’ hot- I Don’t Want Your Life

An Amy Winehouse upskirt- yeeeah

Charles Manson is old- IDLYITW

Happy birthday Lady Gaga- Allie Is Wired

Fred Durst banged Britney Spears- Celeb News Wire

Hope Dworaczyk is in Playboy- Geno’s World

Valentino is dark- popbytes

Cute college girl of the day- College Humor

Cuteness unplugged- Seriously? OMG! WTF?

LiLo needs work- notorious news

Rihanna has been playing the victim for some time now. And rightfully so. But last night when Rihanna was leaving Les Deux nightclub in L.A. she was pulled over by the cops. For some reason or another Rihanna is incapable of driving herself and when she was pulled over it was her driver that had to answer questions by the po. The reason for them being pulled over was no front license plate and tinted windows.

I can understand the tinted windows bu I am not sure why they didn’t have a front license plate. I am assuming this is some sort of car service and that the vehicle didn’t actually belong to Rihanna. The question is, why the fuck is she out partying anyway? Is she such an attention whore that she would rather go out and get photographed by the paparazzi and face awkward questions from total strangers about hooking back up with Chris Brown instead of staying low key until the trial blows over? That does it for me. If she is gonna get her ass kicked and then hook back up with the same guy and then go out and party as if nothing happened then fuck her. My feeling sorry for her has officially ended. Don’t get me wrong. I still want to see Chris Brown do years in prison for the incident, but I could care less what happens to Rihanna now.

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Links that have a suspended driver’s license

Natasha Richardson is ‘irreplaceable’ – IDLYITW

American Idol- sing for your supper- Allie Is Wired

Blake Lively and Leighton Meester like ice cream- Celeb News Wire

Brit Brit and K-Fed are falling in love again- yeeeah

Jessica Alba has a killer ass- I Don’t Want Your Life

Carrie Underwood has a pink ass- Drunken Stepfather

American Idol is rigged. Well maybe not- IDLYITW

How to lose friends and alienate people looks like a funny movie- Holy Moly

Even Lindsay Lohan is getting heckled- IBBB

Octomom can’t catch a break- Geno’s World

The Tudors are back. Fuck yea! – popbytes

Cute college girl of the day- College Humor

Jewel likes being a snaggletooth- Seriously? OMG! WTF?

Britney Spears doesn’t know how to write- notorious news

After Chris Brown beat Rihanna to a pulp, they started feeling sorry for each other and they hooked back up. They even recorded a duet together. Now Rihanna flew to New York to hang out with some of her other music mogul friends while chris Brown stayed back in L.A. to record a cd that no one on earth is going to buy. Sources say that Chris is just obsessed with his music and that is why he didn’t make the trip.

Truth be told, if he ever showed his facein the presence of Jay-Z and other music stars, they would probably beat the shit out of him. That and the fact that Rihanna is probably sick and tired of dating someone who looks like they are 15 years old. You know I have been in a similar situation before. I have had to smack around hos now and then. Give em’ my 2 cents. Put them in their place. And the result was unquestioned loyalty and total service on their part. Get me a lemonade was no longer a request but a direct order. And in the end, we were both better for it. So watch out Chris Brown. Don’t let your little slave escape to NYC where her music friends will fill her head with ideas of liberalism and freedum. Keep that bitch under your thumb.

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Links that are in a solid relationship

Everyone is ugly next to Doutzen Kroes- IDLYITW

Kentucky Fried Chicken doesn’t have “chefs” – IBBB

Natasha Richardson is not dead- Holy Moly

Faye Dunaway looks like a burn victim- Drunken Stepfather

Hayden Panettiere is a pig- I Don’t Want Your Life

Reese Witherspoon is off the market? Doubt it- yeeeah

Amber Le Bon is a model- IDLYITW

Guy Ritchie has moved on from Madonna- Celeb News Wire

Lady Gaga wants to bang Prince Harry- Allie Is Wired

Tori Amos has a new kickass single- popbytes

Octomom brings home two of her octuplets- Geno’s World

American Idol’s Adam Lambert is scary- Seriously? OMG! WTF?

Cute college girl of the day- College Humor

Octomom gets swarmed by paparazzi- notorious news

Rihanna is still making the mistake of her life by standing by Chris Brown, but their relationship isn’t just superficial. They are actually in the studio right now recording a duet together. i am sure it is a song about how relationships have ups and downs but in the end they still survive. Well Rihanna did survive, barely. I could see them talking to each other on the phone or even texting, which is what started this whole mess in the first place, but hanging out face to face makes me think Rihanna just wants to make herself into the cliche beaten up girlfriend you hear so much about in country music.

” He beat me because he loves me” is what she will tell her family. In the meantime the majority of the viewing public will make fun of her, me included, until she breaks up with this monster. I am sure the other guys at the recording studio are just thrilledthat they get to work with Chris Brown. How much more awkward could this situation be? Not much. And the song they are recording is for Chris’ album due out later this year. Who the fuck is going to buy it? Rihanna fans? Not likely. If I were him I would plead guilty, get the jail time done with and try to move on in his life being a construction worker or some shit.

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Links that beat before they can get beaten

Britney Spears’ pussy was hanging out- IDLYITW

Cristy from Intervention- IBBB

Amy Winehouse is still obsessing over her ex- Holy Moly

J-Love is slim and she is showing it off- Drunken Stepfather

Hayden Panettiere is getting bigger boobies- I Don’t Want Your Life

Kat Von D is pretty- yeeeah

Megan Fox is doing something- IDLYITW

Tom Cruise reminds me of nuns at my catholic grade school- Celeb News Wire

A Spice Girl had a baby- Allie Is Wired

Jamie Lynn Spears is going country- popbytes

Now THIS is how you teach kids- Geno’s World

Christian Bale will not be Batman again- Seriously? OMG! WTF?

Cute college girl of the day- College Humor

Tina Davis started the Chris Brown/Rihanna fight- notorious news

Rihanna is a shallow dumb bitch, so I guess she can not find another guy to hook up with. I took it pretty easy on Rihanna in the past few weeks because I felt sorry for her. But not anymore. Rumors are circulating and People confirms that she is indeed back with Chris Brown. More than likely she will probably not press charges either. They are staying at P.Diddy’s mansion, making Diddy an enabler, in Miami and apparently Chris is trying to get some studio time in.

I hope he writes a song about how he kicked the fuck out of his girlfriend. That would make a cool song. I am not sure exactly who he thinks is going to buy this cd. I doubt any of his cds will sell after what he did. Which is a shame because before he beat up Rihanna, he was one of the hottest song writers in L.A. and just about every hip hop artist wanted to record with him. Is that me feeling sorry for him? How dare I! I am going to slap myself in the face and give myself a swirly in the toilet so I never feel sorry for a girl beater again.

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Links that will never get a finger raised to them

Melissa Theuriau is topless- IDLYITW

J-Lo has an Elvis mullet- IBBB

Adam Lambert is gay- Allie Is Wired

Michelle Williams is topless- Celeb News Wire

Denise Richards gets attention on and off the set of DWTS- Drunken Stepfather

Jessica Alba has fucked up grandma hands- I Don’t Want Your Life

Miley Cyrus jogs in daisy dukes- IDLYITW

LiLo hits up starbucks- Holy Moly

Cute college girl of the day- College Humor

AnnaLynne McCord to Marry Carrot Top- Celebrity Dirty Laundry

Watchmen cast says there won’t be a sequel- Geno’s World

K-Fed is a gold digger extraordinaire! – notorious news

Amy Winehouse has landed in the U.K. – popbytes

Chris Brown is a very aggressive individual. After reading this story I decided to put myself in his shoes. If I were Rihanna’s boyfriend, and an argument escalated to the point of me beating the shit out of her, which I never would, then I would try to stay as far away from her as possible because she is more than likely is going to press charges. But Chris doesn’t see it that way. Instead he has been calling Rihanna on multiple occasions trying to hook back up with her.

Now this is probably only so Rihanna will take pity on him and not press charges for assault. I seriously doubt this is going to happen. And with stars like Lindsay Lohan and Lily Allen getting matching “shhh…” tattoos on their fingers similar to what Rihanna has, I don’t think anyone from outside the relationship is going to encourage Rihanna to hook up with the girl beater. A source says, ” Chris called Rihanna to wish her a happy birthday. He’s absolutely trying to get back into her good graces. He knows he’s very much in the doghouse right now, and is doing everything he can to show her how sorry he is.” I have a bit of advice for Chris Brown. Stay away from Rihanna. You have guys like Jay-Z and Ja Rule wanting to beat the shit out of you. This isn’t a good time to try to reconsolidate your relationship. Oh and don’t go out in public either. I hear many other people, former fans included, want to very much so castrate you. I have never been castrated but I hear it is like a circumcision only they take a little bit more off the top. Either way, I would barricade myself in my house and never leave. Just my advice.

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TMZ has exclusively released a photo taken by the police the night of the Rihanna/Chris Brown beat down. Hey I rhymed. Maybe I should do a song with Chris Brown. Anyway, this has launched an investigation into the LAPD as to who exactly leaked the photo. But the paparazzi and the press, including me, are very happy these photos were released. No comment from the Rihanna camp about the leaked photo but I am sure they are not very happy.

This doesn’t even look like Rihanna. which gives you a pretty good idea of how big of a monster Chris Brown really is. I hope this guy does a decade in jail. Her eyes are closed possibly because they are swollen but the majority of the blemishes on her face looks like they came from fists. I am not a forensics expert I am just going on what I see in the pic. Her bottom lip looks about twice the original size. I also heard rumors that the police took photos of bite marks on Rihanna’s arms but those photos have yet to surface. The only question is, what will the Rihanna camp say and how much money do you think that police officer who sold the photo got? The comments from the Rihanna camp are a little more important but the price tag for these photos intrigue me. Anyway, I hope Rihanna gets better soon and I hope Chris Brown wakes up one morning with morning wood and all of a sudden his penis mysteriously falls off.

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