Miley Cyrus
OK, Miley Cyrus. I Give In.
Mar 3rd
Rekon these taste like bacon?
You win, Miley. I give up trying to keep Dateline off my front porch. With a rack like that and the can-do attitude we’ve been seeing, you’ve won the boners hearts and minds of the American people.
What’s that you say? She’s 18? Well that’s horse of a different color, or as I like to say,” ‘scuse me while I rub one out to them tit-tays”. In a totally respectful way, of course. Girl power!
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- Have a look at this side boob, muthafucka.
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- Rekon these taste like bacon?
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- Hey Y’all, wanna dive in here?
ZOMG, Y’all! Miley Cyrus to star in ‘LOL’
Aug 24th
"Hey Miley, there's your vajayjay"
Miley Cyrus is set star in “LOL” along with Demi Moore who plays her exasperated grandmother mom. Ah, I just love a coming of age tale of mothers and daughters trying to connect amidst all the distractions of social networking, Blackburries, blue toofs and naked web cams. Please be focused on the communication gap between a mother and a daughter due to increasing social media use which is only exacerbated once the mom reads the daughter’s racy diary! What’s the good Pop, Eater:
The film focuses on communication gap between Lola and her mother, due to the increasing use of YouTube, iTunes and Facebook. Lola’s mom, Anne, “accidentally” reads her teenage daughter’s racy journal and dicovers Lola’s wild ways.
ZOMG! That was totally tltr! Apparently, Miley not only ttly’s her mom all the time, she smokes pot, gets laid, talks about sex, gets drunk, kisses a girl and gets a bikini wax [just like your mom last night] Â to the chagrin of her distraught mother, Demi Moore. I really hope this doesn’t ruin Miley’s wholesome image. What will the kids at the MTV music Awards think? [They'll think she missed a spot with the Brazilian wax in that pic. Caipirinha!]
Miley Cyrus is Dating a Pedophile Again
Aug 21st
Miley Cyrus though being very young, is looking for love all over the place. Her most recent boyfriend was rumored to be Nick Jonas but he wears a girly little promise ring that means he will not have sex for a million years or some shit. But Miley couldn’t wait and now she was photographed making out with some 18 year old dude named Liam Hemsworth – who plays her boyfriend in Last Song.
This doesn’t necessarily make the guy a pedophile, but he is dating, and probably fucking, a chick who is under the age of 18 which is probably illegal somewhere. Billy Ray Cyrus doesn’t really give a shit because by her dating someone not in her age range means that it will drum up some publicity and the Achey Breaky Heart singer thinks just about any publicity is good publicity. Point is, this dude will never go to jail for banging Miley Cyrus because he is a celebrity and Billy Ray would hold a protest outside of the courthouse if the police ever did take him in. Again P-U-B-L-I-C-I-T-Y.
Image via
Miley Cyrus: Don’t Call Me Fat
May 18th
Miley Cyrus hit up the beach in the Bahamas this weekend. There is a story here but this post is basically just an excuse to post pictures of her in a bikini. After she noticed the paparazzi snapping pics of her, she took the issue to Twitter and said, ” Talk all you want. i have my flaws. im a normal girl theres thing about my body that i would change but stop calling me f*t in post. i don’t…even like the word. those remarks that you hateful people use are fighting words.”
Aww. Disney isn’t letting her use the word fat. If they are fighting words then Miley better get ready to kick some paparazzi/hater ass. She will probably just cower behind daddy’s crotch and let her parents do the fighting since she is a minor. Afterward she basically said that f*t people are beautiful and then like a schizo going through a personality changed realized she was “hating” on skinny people. She envoked Nicole Richie’s name and said she liked her figure.
So in Miley’s mind it is either morbidly obese or malnourishedly skinny. To be honest I don’t really care what Miley thinks and I have already forgotten what she said cause I am distracted by jailbait in a bikini. Now if I can just explain these pics to my parole officer when he checks my comp for contraband.
[ Images via ]
