Madonna
Madonna Nude Sells For $37,500
Feb 13th
Yuk! I am trying to hold down my puke as I write this. Recently Madonna auctioned off a nude picture of herself which I think was taken before she launched her music career. I won’t torture you by posting the pic here. But there is one word to describe them. Hairy. And for that matter I won’t be posting any recent pictures of Madonna either. Anytime you can avoid seeing her and her witch arms is a bonus.
So who is the perv that actually bought this photo? Well he’s anonymous of course. The dude didn’t even show up to the auction. He phoned it in. To give you an idea of how old Madonna is, she was over 18 in 1979 and only got $25 for the photo shoot in question. What a rip off. It wouldn’t surprise me to hear that she went down to the street and offered a blow job to some John on the street corner for $30. Come on. You know she did it at least once. Playboy was so desperate for celebrity nudity that they actually posted the set of photos in a 1985 issue. This is just too much for me. I am going to toss my breakfast in my toilet bowl.
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Madonna’s Daughter Thinks She Can Act
Jan 5th
Madonna’s daughter Lourdes, who I guess doesn’t have a last name, thinks she can pull her own weight on the big screen. She has just recently enrolled in Manhattan’s Professional Children’s School. This school was made famous by Macaulay Culkin and Scarlett Johansson. Let’s face it, Lourdes, which is one of the most bizarre names I have ever heard, is not going to grow up and become the next Scarlett Johansson.
Becoming the next Macaulay Culkin may be within her sights. I don’t usually critique women who are under the age of 18, but I think the most obvious thing for this kid to do before attempting to try acting would be to shave that heinous uni brow. That thing is massive. Another thing to do before heading to the big screen is change her first name. Getting an actual second name wouldn’t hurt her much either. But I don’t think Lourdes would become the next Madonna of the big screen. When my daughter wanted to try acting I said,” you can once you finish your vegetables.” After forcing broccoli down her throat with a pencil, she said that she didn’t want to do acting and didn’t want to have anything to do with me for the rest of her life. Fucking kids, changing their minds every 10 seconds.
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Links that prefer blogging over acting
Syphilicious is back- IBBB
Britney Spears got hacked! – Allie Is Wired
Kate Moss tit slip- Drunken Stepfather
Cute college girl of the day- College Humor
Amy Winehouse will never put her top on again- yeeeah
Looks who’s blogging now. That sounds like a good name for a movie. – d-listed
Miley Cyrus, still a slut. – Celebrity Dirty Laundry
I Don’t Want Your Life is over… or is it?- I Don’t Want Your Life
Katie Holmes and Angelina Jolie should become hookers- Geno’s World
Greasy Bear! Oh how I have missed Greasy Bear! – The Bastardly
Tara Reid, still in rehab- notorious news
Elisabetta Canalis: Bellisimo- Attu World
Brit, J.T. and Madge To Perform Together
Nov 6th
Well it is gonna be a blowout tonight at Dodger Stadium. We all remember Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera performing on stage and kissing Madonna at the MTV Music Awards or whatever the fuck that was. Now Brit Brit, J.T. and Madge will be raising the roof tonight. No word yet on weather or not there will be lesbian kissing but a guy can hope can’t he?
This thing is gonna go up in flames. Sometimes pop musicians try to out do themselves and end up in the long run just looking like idiots. Ryan Gaycrest had this to say, ” If Britney and Justin end up on that stage with her… I don’t know if I’ve ever seen anything quite like that before.” This is a guy who hosts American Idol and sees 10 killer performances a night by some of the most talented kids in the country and now he is saying that Brit, J.T. and Madge is gonna be something he has never seen before? How shallow is this motherfucker?
I am sure after the concert was announced Gaycrest jumped up and down with his limp wrists flapping in the wind and he peed in his pants a little bit.
