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I don’t usually eat breakfast when I wake up because the thought of food makes me gag. Now I found something brand new to gag about. OK so it isn’t “brand new”. Madonna has had veiny heroin arms for years but this picture emphasizes just about every vein in each arm. People on tv are talking about the pic and are saying that she is veiny because she is so buff.

The fact of the matter is she is so OLD! Ever look closely at your grandmother’s arms? See a resemblance? I thought so. I am not a science teacher so I do not know what it is that makes the skin slip away from the muscle and makes the arms look wrinkly and veiny, but whatever the fuck it is called, Madonna’s got it. OK. I am done with this post. I am going to throw up now.

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OK so maybe Madonna isn’t a serial killer herself, but her little bullshit performances around the world (that feature her trying to look like a sexy 20 year old but actually just depicts a sorry old lady with witch arms) caused two people to die this week. It happened when they were setting up her stage. One man was hit with a crane and died instantly and the police aren’t saying if the second person who just died was a male or a female or how he/she died.

I am sure Madonna is oblivious to all this shit and could care less about the lives of stage hands. When someone came into Madonna’s dressing room and told her a second person died while setting up her stage she said, ” Did you see my thong? I bought a new thong. Wanna see it? It is black. This… now this will make 20 year olds want to fuck me again.”

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Links that are very appealing to 20 year olds

Britney Spears is already cheating- IDLYITW

Jordan is in a bikini/lingerie thing – Allie Is Wired

Ashley Tisdale; still in a bikini, still hot- Drunken Stepfather

Renee Zellweger is the weirdest looking person in Hollywood- Celeb News Wire

Cute college girl of the day- College Humor

Kim Kardashian is a good salesman- IDLYITW

The tabloids were all abuzz yesterday when it was being reported that Madonna was adopting a baby named Mercy James from Malawi. All things looked good until she pulled a Nadya Suleman. What I mean by that is, she tried to adopt as a single mother. Octomom never tried to adopt, but being a single mother meant she wasn’t ready to have a handful of kids. The bid for Mercy has officially been rejected and we are not sure whether or not she will get a second chance to adopt. Hahahahahahahaha!

Actually Madonna will get a second chance because her lawyer filed for an appeal. But things do not look good. The judge said, ” I think the welfare of Chifundo [ African for Mercy] will be better served if she grows within the environment of the culture of Malawi.” Of course, this whole thing may have turned out differently if Madonna had actually showed up to court. The judge would have seen her glowing beauty and her Hollywood sex appeal and would have been in shock of this angel who entered the courtroom. She would have not only granted Madonna adoption rights to Malawi, but would have mentioned coupon Thursday at the local adoption bank. Hell, Madonna would have blown the judges mind so much, that she could partake in the deal without even HAVING a coupon. They don’t offer those 20% off rates to just anyone you know.  

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