Kelly Clarkson did an interview with Self magazine recently and she talked no stop about her weight probably because her fat rolls were crushing the microphone. She said she was comfortable with her weight and that she has never felt uncomfortable on the red carpet blah,blah. The point is, guys are uncomfortable with your weight. They want a skinny little thing to fantasize about have sex with.

She also talked about how she does this workout program that really kicks her work outs into high gear and that the work shows when she is onstage. I have seen her onstage. She is like a rock. She never moves around. She also went on to say that the workouts never last more than 34 minutes. Considering she only works out a few times a week with her busy schedule, she probably only gets an hour and a half of cardio a week. Don’t get me wrong. I love Kelly Clarkson. Her face is very pretty and her music kicks ass but if she wants me to be aroused when I look at her bikini pics, she needs to rely on the treadmill instead of the Krispy Kream box.

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Links that eat 1,200 calories a day

Steven Tyler fell down, couldn’t get up- IDLYITW

Milla Jovovich is in a new movie- Geno’s World

Jessica Simpson is drunk, again- Celebrity Dirty Laundry

Dr.Phil is accused of sexual harassment- yeeeah

Taylor Momsen is dressed like a hooker- Drunken Stepfather

Britney Spears is…hot? ::can not compute::- IDLYITW

Kelly Clarkson is on the market. That is not anything new, she has been single practically her entire adult life. And that is not because of the little extra junk in her trunk. She is still very good looking. She tells Us magazine, ” Oh, my God, I have no desire.” When she was asked about having kids. ” I would not be a good mother.” The reason for that probably is because she is in the closet.

Granted she did make out with some dude in the video My Life Would Suck Without Youbut that doesn’t prove anything. I am not out to slander Clarkson good name, but let’s face it I really am. She goes on to tell Us magazine, ” I went to see He’s Just Not That Into You the other night, and honestly, you walk away from that movie feeling so glad that you’re single.” Actually Kelly, that movie is about people trying not to be single. It is a movie, you take a dateto. All of this is lost on Kelly Clarkson. It is like talking to a retarded brick wall. Maybe she did bring a date and she didn’t even know it. But alas, that date didn’t have a penis between her legs.

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Kelly Clarkson has a new cd out. And with that a new song, and it kicks major ass. So much ass in fact, that her new single jumped from No.97 to No.1 within a week. That is a record breaking jump in the 50 year history of the Billboard charts. Formerly the record setting jump was Britney Spears Womanizer that went from No.96 to No.1. Oh snap! One spot! Suck on that Britney you fat bitch! OK I need to calm down. The song in question is My Life Would Suck Without You. Check it out on iTunes, it’s a killer track.

I just find VERY amusing that the so-called queen of pop can be outdone by an American Idol winner. Britney will probably say good job and congratulate Kelly in person but you know behind the scenes she is banging her head against the wall. Of course Britney would probably be banging her head against the wall regardless, but now she has a reason.

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Links that are No.1 every day

Paris Hilton nipple pokies! – Drunken Stepfather

Jennifer Aniston turns down $4 million from Playboy- Allie Is Wired

Jessica Simpson tries to chalk up weight gain as PR stunt- yeeeah

Cute college girl of the day- College Humor

Will YOU buy Tropic Thunder on dvd? – Holy Moly

Mickey Rourke is not a real wrestler- d-listed

Kim Kardashian takes Jessica Simpson’s side- Geno’s World

Jessica Alba has a tramp stamp- Celeb News Wire

Victoria Beckham has a nice car- I Don’t Want Your Life

Amy Winehouse is still topless- notorious news

Kelly Clarkson.

Gross. If she ever loses her Vitamin Water contract, she would be a great spokesperson for Proactiv–they wouldn’t even need to Photoshop her “before” pictures. Anyway, I guess that millions of dollars can buy a girl a lot of things, but for Kelly proper dematology treatments is not one of them. Let’s look at Kelly in a bikini sans noticeable bacne and on the beach last summer . . .

[Fatback's note: 'ROID RAGE! GRRRRR!]