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Archive for the ‘Jessica Simpson’ Category

Please God No…

Please God No...

Rumors are now floating around that Jessica Simpson might be getting a role as a judge on American Idol. I don’t really see how she fits the bill but then again neither did Paula Abdul. Let’s face it, Jessica Simpson is a one hit wonder that is only still in the news because she is fucking gorgeous. If you didn’t listen to pop radio at the beginning of the century then you probably think Jessica Simpson is famous for being famous.

Nothing has been confirmed by the producers at Idol but her dad, yea her dad, is doing everything in his power to see that she gets the gig. This is the same dude who is obsessed with her breasts and thinks that she should do Playboy. She should really listen to her dad sometimes. He seems to have a lot of good information. Basically Idol is willing to hire anyone that will take $2 mil a year. I am available but when the producers heard that they each had an orgasm of joy and are currently comatose. I am waiting for them to come to and I will hear back then.

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Tags: Jessica Simpson Posted in Jessica Simpson |
By Tom O

Jessica Simpson is Back on the Market

Jessica Simpson is Back on the Market

After being together for,what, over a year Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson has split. This is one particular courtship I could care less about because now that Jessica is on the market, me and everyone I know still doesn’t have a snowballs chance in hell of hooking up with her. She doesn’t have a low self esteem and she knows exactly how hot she is and will land just about any stud that she wants.

However, she will be getting more hot in the months to come. Especially on the small screen, because she sucks at the big screen, with a show called The Price of Beauty. I didn’t know about the show until today but I am sure it will revolve around Jessica being a dumb, but hot, blonde who asks things like, is it chicken or fish? At which point all the desperate female teens out there that are starving themselves to look like Jessica will say OMG she is like, sooo funny! And then they will puke up their dinner.



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Links that stay on the market

Kim Kardashian likes her some leather- IDLYITW

People who should never be naked are naked- Geno’s World

Ivanka Trump has got back- I Don’t Want Your Life

5 awesome deleted scenes from movies- Attu World

The travelocity gnome to titty fuck Holly Madison- yeeeah

Ashlee Simpson should think this through- IDLYITW


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Tags: Jessica Simpson Posted in Jessica Simpson |
By Tom O

Jessica Simpson Is Coming Back To T.V. Nooooooooooooooooo!

Jessica Simpson Is Coming Back To T.V. Noooooooo!

Not getting her kicks in the country music field, which I am not surprised about, Jessica Simpson wants to try her luck again on television. This time instead of a show starring two sexy newlyweds and their sexy life in their gated community, this one will be about how Jessica is a bit over weight now and her views on what is and isn’t beautiful in the worlds different cultures.

This sounds like a piece of crap. Not only will the pilot not take off, I doubt any real television station would even seriously consider it. The thing is, it has been too long. Jessica gained a few pounds, and still looked hot, but everyone thought it was just a publicity stunt to get more attention and then stage a “how I lost my weight” magazine shoot. Now people thinks she just has an eating disorder. Don’t get me wrong I would still totally bang her, but this time I need to put a twinky on a stick in front of her when I do her from behind. It is about the only way I can keep her attention.

[ Image via ]

Source

Links that hate both big and small screen

Mel Gibson has 8 kids now- IDLYITW

Larry King is old and stupid- Amy Grindhouse

Jodie Marsh is a body builder now- yeeeah

Heather Graham bored by strippers- Celeb News Wire

Starbucks has some solid competition- Drunken Stepfather

Michael Lohan arrested for death threats- Holy Moly

Shoot it! – IDLYITW

Ashley Tisdale. Whatever. She’s hot. – notorious news

If you cherish your ears, you won’t watch this video- Geno’s World

Avril Lavigne is in a bikini- I Don’t Want Your Life

Cute college girl of the day- College Humor

Monster Chris Brown says he’s not a monster- Allie Is Wired

Harriet Carter wednesday- IBBB

Angelina Jolie might be pregnant. Maybe she’s not. Maybe she is. – popbytes

Hugh Jackman and Daniel Craig are going to do Broadway together. – Seriously? OMG! WTF?


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Tags: Jessica Simpson Posted in Jessica Simpson |
By Tom O
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