Hayden Panettiere
Those Thighs Could Kill You!
Jan 23rd
If you have a thigh fantasy in which you imagine a sweet death experienced between a stocky girl’s amply-muscled thighs, well, I’m pretty sure that Hayden Panettiere can provide that for you. When she’s legal, of course. Oh wait, she’s already dating a 30 old man so I guess there doesn’t need to be a wait. Hayden’s thighs amaze me, and not in a good way. Hayden and her thighs went grocery shopping with her dad today and provided me with deeper insight into their structure. From these new pictures, I’m pretty sure they measure about five inches from knee to the top of the thigh. I’ve been enlighted. And grossed out.
Hayden Panettierre Will Be Your Fat Aunt One Day
Oct 24th
Thank you for bending over in front of paparazzi while shopping for your new camera, Hayden. Because now everyone will see what I’ve been saying forever. But, first they have to click on the link . . . I’m too damn poor to actually purchase the picture!
I’m sick of all the “great body†praised heaped on Hayden. The girl is like 5 foot-even on a good day, and her legs are thick and bowed. Seriously, in about 20 years Hayden will look like your fat aunt who embarrasses you every year at the beach as she parades around her cellulite-ridden, huge fat ass and thighs without wearing a wrap even when your mom softly suggests it.
Anyway, Hayden is heading down Fat Avenue, though her youth is preventing it from happening at this point in time. But in the future, there is nothing–not even plastic surgery–that can prevent the genetic destiny given to her with short, stubby, thick legs.
They Can Scream for Me Anytime
Oct 22nd
Thanks to this weekend’s Spike TV’s “Scream Awards,” there were no hot actresses left floating around the streets of L.A. Nope, they were all at the Greek Theater, indeed. The Scream Awards are supposedly a celebration of the year’s best in Horror, Sci-Fi, Fantasy, and Comics, but I’m pretty sure it’s a veritable celebration of the best in T&A.
I have to hand it to Spike TV for getting Megan Fox, Jessica Alba, Kristanna Loken, and Jessica Biel in the same room. Though, had Spike also provided the girls with champagne, a hot tub, a false assurance of privacy, and then a live internet feed, it would have made for an even more interesting evening. But, I digress . . .
Check out the hotness at the Scream Awards, as well as the crumbs (i.e. Paris Hilton) . . .
Hayden Panettiere is Single
Sep 12th
Hayden Panettiere, 18, and Stephen Colletti (that dude from Laguna Beach), 21, have split after dating for almost two years. Us Magazine reports:
As a source tells Us,”Their breakup has been a long time coming.” But that doesn’t mean the former sweethearts are feuding. Panettiere tells Us, “We are still very close friends and talk to each other frequently. We appreciate and support each other’s careers.”
Each other careers?? Hayden Panettiere stars in one of the most critically and commercially successful shows on television. The only thing I’ve ever seen this dude in is pictures holding Hayden’s hand. I didn’t know that was considered a career. I wonder what he’s going do next? Probably be giving me a test drive in a 2008 Ford F-150. And he better give me a good deal. The guy at the other dealership told me he’d take my trade no matter how much I owe!
