Celebrity Gossip
A Family Restraining Order
Apr 27th
Dina Lohan and her children have had enough of Michael Lohan’s shit and now they are all getting a restraining order. According to Michael, during his TMZ interview he said that they have no legal right to get a restraining order but I guess the guy is gonna believe what he wants to believe.
Ali is still young and I seriously doubt she wants to have a restraining order against her dad but she will follow “the grand book of Hollywood” that Lindsay lays out for her so that some day she will be as famous and talentless as her big sister. As for Dina, bitch looks like she got a nose job by the same quack that did Michael Jackson.
Lindsay Lohan Fails, Again
Apr 26th
It seems that Lindsay Lohan can not catch a break. First her dad barges in her apartment where she was trying to get high in peace and then her father goes to TMZ to talk down his own daughter. I personally agree with Michael Lohan 100% and don’t think it is necessary to give Lindsay Lohan my blind loyalty just because I am a blogger.
Now LiLo got dumped from a movie called The Other Side which was about some chick on a desert island or some shit. It had a lot of big names tied to it and Lindsay was gonna be the star but then the management team decided to dump her because she was too unreliable. I can’t really say I blame them.
Alicia Silverstone Wants To Be Pregnant, I Want To Help
Apr 26th
Alicia Silverstone is smokin’ hot, 33 years old and married and for some reason she has not shit out a little puppy yet. The only conclusion I can come to is that her husband is gay and is only staying married to her because he wants to prove to his friends and family that he is in fact straight.
If Alicia Silverstone wants to get pregnant so bad then she can just call me. I can help her out. I won’t even have to touch her. You see my sperm is so potent that it is considered airborne. I can just look at her and three weeks later she will be showing up positive on one of those home pregnancy tests.
Of course I would never do that. And by that I mean I would never be in the same room with Alicia Silverstone and not touch her. That is a crime in some states. In fact, in four states out of the union it is illegal to be in the same room with Alicia Silverstone and not rip her clothes off and ravage her like a viking. So I would have to have my way with her. I don’t want to go to jail.
The Cops Visited With Lindsay Lohan
Apr 23rd
Michael Lohan seems to be 110% positive that Lindsay Lohan needs help. I have seen the pics of her falling down drunk every night and she is currently on probation from the court saying that she is not supposed to drink or use drugs but the court also is not requiring her to do drug or alcohol tests.
Yesterday Michael Lohan got two sheriff deputies to pay a visit with Lindsay and he accompanied them to her apartment. Strangely, the landlord just handed the keys to Lindsay’s place over to Michael and the cops. The reason they let him go in there was because Lindsay’s little sister Ali was staying with Lindsay at the time and Ali is a minor.
Afterwards, Michael went on TMZ and talked about how Lindsay needs an intervention blah,blah,blah. I am gonna take a unique viewpoint to this situation and say I am gonna team with Michael. As much as I love to see LiLo out clubbing and getting shitfaced, I think she is about one million times hotter when she is sober.
She tends to have this over constipated look on her face these days and I want the old Lindsay back. That’s right bitches. You heard it here first. Team Michael!
Weekend links that are deeply concerned. LOL.
Whore beach- IDLYITW
Kate Gosselin is looking for some new dick- Allie Is Wired
Olivia Munn is in a bikini- Drunken Stepfather
Britney Spears’ saggy nipple pokies- Celeb News Wire
Cute college girl of the day- College Humor
Lindsay Lohan is a suspect in a Rolex theft too- Yeeeah
Peaches Geldof out and about in Britain- Holy Moly
Hayden Panettiere cut her hair- Amy Grindhouse
Stephanie Pratt naked for PETA- IBBB
Vanessa Hudgens takes candid pics, keeps clothes on, disappoints- Celeb Jihad
See who was voted off American Idol- Daily Stab
