Fatback Media

Wow, Hef and his Girls Next Door look so happy together at the Fox Reality Channel’s Really Awards last night! It’s great when arranged relationships just really do work out, huh? Okay, enough sarcasm. Holly Madison is faking the same tight-lipped smile as Hef, Bridgette Marquardt is somewhere between a smirk and a smile, and Kendra Wilkinson is simply not amused. Damn! Can someone connected please tell Hef that I’d smile in a picture with him any day (hint-hint)?  By the way, this is Lennox Miller from SupernaturalBlond.com guest-posting, and not Fatback.  I mean he does also fantasize about being a Girl Next Door, but he’d never write about that here.  Ooops!

If Jessica Simpson’s country music career fails her, I think she’d be highly successful in porn. The expressions she makes while singing are damn priceless. Sometimes she looks like she’s in pain, sometimes in ecstasy, and sometimes a delightful mixture of both . . . well, delightful for pervs, that is. From the looks of her face while performing at the L.A. County Fair this weekend, I’m certain she’d sweep the 2010 AVNs!
(P.S. This is Lennox Miller guest-posting for Fatback while he’s doing his top secret Mafia mission in Italy. If you like what you’re reading, come check out my blog at SupernaturalBlond.com where it’s gossip about hot girls by a hot girl. That would be me.  Oh yeah!)

Hey Look! The “better than…” linkposts are back. You remember those, right? That’s where I would do my link post of all my sexy blogger friends, but I would say that their links were better than [insert delicious southern food item]. Yeah. I know, right? Fucking. Witty.

Anyway. I’m going on a short vacation to Europe to take care of some embassy and foreign relations kinda stuff. Mostly hush-hush. So I’ve got some guest writers sitting in for bit while I’m off infiltrating enemy security attending embassy parties, dancing with Ambassador’s daughters and drinking  pink gins out of cut glass tumblers. So enjoy the guest posts while I’m gone, baby. If you don’t hear from me within 2 weeks, then we’re going box 4 protocol and I’ll see you at the safe house.

Also, who is Aubrey O’Day? She doesn’t look Irish.

More Aubrey O’Day than you can shake a stick at.

I can’t even count how many times i’ve picked up a hitchhiker pulling this exact same pose

I want a pair of these Megan Fox shoes!!! | Chisme Time

Yawn - Webster’s Is My Bitch

Professor Wikipedia - CollegeHumor video

Cute College Girl on CollegeHumor

cityrag: Rihanna’s Tattoos

Does Miley Cyrus have a 20-year-old boyfriend?

Alena Seredova, nude perfect breasts

Keeley Hazell nude again…again

Amy Winehouse Too Ugly To Attend Her Own Birthday Party

This is Megan Fox shooting a spread for the new GQ. Wonder what it’s like to wake up as the hottest chick on earth? I used to ask your mom that. What a whore! There is a video for this (LINK) but I wouldn’t click it at work unless you don’t mind spontaneously fondling your junk at your cubicle. I personally have no problem with it. But somebody needs to get their cute little ass back into the HR office and stop judging.

OMFG UPDATE: So apparently this GQ article reports that Megan Fox got freaky with girl.  A RUSSIAN STRIPPER NAMED NIKITA.

“Well, that year my boyfriend broke up with me, and I decided - oh man, sorry, mommy! - that I was in love with this girl that worked at the Body Shop,” Fox said. “I decided that I was going to get her to love me back, and I went out of my way to create a relationship with this girl, a stripper named Nikita.”

Fox said Nikita would do “these beautiful slow dances to Aerosmith ballads.” She added that she would bring the Russian stripper gifts and try to inspire her to quit her line of work.

Despite the relationship, Fox said she does not identify herself as gay.

“Look, I’m not a lesbian,” she went on. “I just think that all humans are born with the ability to be attracted to both sexes.

“I mean, I could see myself in a relationship with a girl - Olivia Wilde is so sexy she makes me want to strangle a mountain ox with my bare hands,” she continued. “She’s mesmerizing. And lately I’ve been obsessed with Jenna Jameson, but … oh boy.” (US)

If you’ll excuse me, I just fucking died.

See the video here and be prepared to prematurely lose your junk.

Apologies to Willie, but having a cowboy as your hero is a little uh… YMCA for me.

Here’s Heroes star Ali Larter gettin’ her cowgirl on down in the ‘bu. Malibu has become The Ivy if southern California beaches. What was once the rich person’s private getaway is now the place for the Heidi Montag’s of the world to cavort in the ubiquitous bikini sporting the “Whaaa…? A photographer?? WHERE?!?!?” look. I digress..

Ali Larter is an American Hero of slender, sinewy muscular proportions. Here’s how to take a regular hot chick and make her a hero. Add 2 or more of the following:

1. Cowboy hat (worn ironically of course)
2. bikini
3. 1-3 dogs (one of which must be adorably ugly)
4. Water
5. All of the above in my apartment (minus the ugly dog)

More Ali heroically emerging from the mighty pacific. PS. Nice shave.