Fatback Media » Bikini

Well, Why Not?

fatback — Fri, 12 Dec 2008 17:42:59 +0000

This is Audrina Patridge trying on bikinis. [I thought that you weren't allowed to do that because your junk touches the fabric? Note to self: NEVER try on bikini before washing]. And why wouldn’t Audrina Partridge buy a new bikini? She’s a hot chick with big tits and that’s pretty much all she does for the world. Of all the vapid bitches on the completely scripted and made-up show, The Hills, Audrina Patridge is the least unlikable. She’s got great tits and she likes to get her picture taken in bikinis (and naked) which makes her a hero in 42 countries and three island nations. What she doesn’t do is try to sell clothes, or merchandise, or endorsements or be smart. Which is why I’m pretty sure that I’m going to marry her for a while.

Joanna Krupa Seems Smart

fatback — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 17:24:25 +0000

This is Joanna Krupa, about the hottest thing to come out of Poland since buffalo grass vodka and solidarity. When she’s not talking in that sexy Polish accent she’s usually in a bikini or nude. Here she is with Cindy Taylor From E! showing how smart and self reliant girls can look when they wear high heels with a bikini. I’d also like to mention that I hate one-peice bathing suits but Joanna seems to pull it off better than your mother did back in the 80’s. What a tramp.

PS. Is that an airbrushed camel-toe in the banner pic? Discuss.

More Joanna Krupa Nude

Jessica Alba Can Go Back To The Gym Now

fatback — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 04:33:24 +0000

Ahh… Remember this? Jessica Alba the hot 20 something with perfect skin and an even better body? Here’s to hoping that she’ll get her P90X on and get back into fighting shape for the rest of the summer.

Kate Hudson’s Perfect Lil’ Booty

Lennox Miller — Tue, 04 Mar 2008 13:06:24 +0000

This is Kate Hudson reflecting all incoming light while in Miami earlier this week. Bet you didn’t know that skinny lil’ Kate Hudson had such an amazing ass. Neither did I. I’m truly fascinated by it. It’s so round, little, and perfect. If I had that ass I’d be showing it in a thong bikini as well. What is troubling about Kate, though, is that even after having a kid her breasts are still like an A cup. Wouldn’t pregnancy make a woman’s breasts grow? I guess Kate’s body restricts its fullness and absolute hotness to her ass only. And I’m 100% okay with that . . .

Brooke Hogan Bikini Pics

Lennox Miller — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 13:04:32 +0000

Why Brooke Hogan, are you sporting a penis along with your implants? Sure looks that way to me here in this new set of pics. That, or maybe she keeps her hoo-ha a little too insulated. But before I go off on a tangent pondering Brooke’s hoo-ha, or, perhaps, penis, let me say that the implants she got like a year ago really have helped make her look a bit more feminine. She still looks like she could kill a man with her bare hands, but now she has boobs. And that’s a good death, especially if you’re a samurai. I guess being Hulk Hogan’s daughter she really never had a chance at having a feminine body . . .

Eva Longoria’s Vacay Bikini Pics!

Lennox Miller — Wed, 20 Feb 2008 12:08:08 +0000

Oh, I don’t know what really needs to be said here about Eva Longoria’s vacation pics from Cabo San Lucas. Maybe that she has a sweet ass. Or maybe that overall she has a killer body. Or maybe that she is absolutely adorable even without makeup. Oh wait, we already knew all that. I guess, just enjoy the view . . .

Christina Milian Is My Girl Friday

Lennox Miller — Fri, 04 Jan 2008 15:19:47 +0000

Happy Friday! Christina Milian is my new girl crush. After the slew of bikini pics circulating the web from this past week, she’s wrangled her way into my conscience and made me obsess over her tight stomach. I want that stomach! And you’ll notice a trend amongst photos of Christina–she is always wearing a perky, cute smile. She’s so adorable that I’ll even forgive her for playing the lead in the remake of “Can’t Buy Me Love” (i.e. “Love Don’t Cost a Thing” from 2003). I mean the original is an 80’s classic and I resent when such classics are remade. But I digress. Christina Milian has a hot, tight body and is simply adorable. Enjoy these barely-clad pics of her below . . .

Presenting Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Lower Half

Lennox Miller — Thu, 29 Nov 2007 12:30:15 +0000

Oh the guilt I have in posting about Jennifer Love Hewitt’s ass! I mean, she’s always seemed like a really nice girl–decent, wholesome, intelligent, non-slutty. She’s not a Paris or Lindsey, and I really don’t want to attack her . . .But that ass!

Her ass made a huge appearance on the beach yesterday and the pics are flying in cyberspace. I want to be the better blogger and not write about her cellulite and the general size of her hips, thighs, and ass, I really do, but come on–that ass wants to be discussed! She apparently just got engaged to a Mix-A-Lot fan as well.

“They got engaged last week,” her rep tells Us. The couple is currently vacationing in Hawaii. (source)

Granted JLH has looked very pear-shaped for the last year or so, but she’s always been in clothing and I had no idea of the true extent of her curves. Mostly I guess I’m just in shock that someone who was once so adorable and small has been hiding this under her clothing . . .

Kate Walsh Looks Damn Good (and she’s 40!)

Lennox Miller — Sun, 25 Nov 2007 21:44:06 +0000

Hey, Miss Lennox here. I’m happy to be back in F&C action and presenting you with bikini pics of the lovely Kate Walsh from this past weekend in Hawaii. Kate plays Dr. Addison Montgomery on “Private Practice,” ex wife of Dr. McDreamy on “Grey’s Anatomy.” While I enjoy “Grey’s,” I just cannot watch “Private Practice” because it makes my vagina hurt. No, really, I’m serious. There is such an excess of estrogen on the show that the characters’ vaginas must secretly be communicating with my own. And I don’t like that one bit.

However, I do adore beautiful Kate Walsh . . . especially in a bikini . . .

Carmen Electra Gets Wet

Lennox Miller — Tue, 14 Aug 2007 10:29:25 +0000

Sure, Carmen Electra has made some really awful choices in men . . . that little Leprechaun Prince, Dennis Rodman, that other Leprechaun Dave Navarro . . . but none of that seems important to me now. All I care about is how fucking hot she is in her bikini frolicking on the beach. If the rumors are true, Joan Jett is one lucky lesbian!

As for me, I’m now inspired to go make myself vomit now and then not eat for two days . . . and maybe run on a treadmill for three hours straight.

Editor’s note: We had to take the nude pics and put them in the NSFW section. Enjoy these, then go see Carmen Electra nude…