Archive for January, 2010
Lindsay Lohan is Gonna be Topless
Jan 29th
There is a new movie coming out called Machete directed by Robert Rodriguez. It doesn’t seem like all that good of a movie except for the fact that Lindsay is going to be skinny dipping in a waterfall. That sounds good. As much of an attention whore that she is, she still hasn’t shown off that killer little ass of hers.
If this movie doesn’t show LiLo booty I will never write about her again. OK there is no truth to that at all but I will seriously be pissed off. One thing that I am banking on is that she is going to show off her saggy cocaine tits in this movie. I have seen them like a million times so I could care less if I see them again but that ass? I am getting all worked up. I will have to pace myself until it hits theatres.
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Weekend links thats last name does not end with Lohan
I wanna be a Miranda Kerr ass picker- IDLYITW
Cindy Crawford is still alive- Celebrity Dirty Laundry
Katy Perry is…kinda gross- Allie Is Wired
Brooke Burns ruins a see through moment- Drunken Stepfather
Brittany Murphy’s husband sues Hollywood- Celeb News Wire
Cute college girl of the day- College Humor
I don’t think Suri Cruise likes being held anymore- Geno’s World
Dita Von Teese’s cleavage is…wow!- yeeeah
Matthew McConaughey is over dressed for the beach- popbytes
Some British people do British stuff gov’na- Holy Moly
Brooke Hogan is a hoss male man with a penis- Amy Grindhouse
Kristin Cavallariis still smokin’ hot- IBBB
Michael Lohan Got Arrested
Jan 29th
Michael Lohan’s life is totally fubar right now. He spends 99% of his time making phone calls to his ex-wife and recording them so he can sell them to Radar Online later. He made one such phone call the other day but it wasn’t to his ex wife. It was to Erin Muller which is his ex girlfriend and she happens to have a restraining order against him.
By him calling her, he was in clear violation of the restraining order and Erin called the cops and he got arrested. I know he has a little bromance with Jon Gosselin and now that he is heading to the clink maybe he can make some bromances in there. Only they won’t be his “bro” they will be his “friend”. And by friend I mean someone who violates your anus on an hourly basis and trades your body away for cigarettes.
ABC Cancels Ugly Betty
Jan 28th
There are a lot of trendy shows out there and because I read a number of tabloid entertainment blogs on a daily basis I hear about them ALL THE TIME. I never jump on the bandwagon because I can just read the spoiler son a blog the next day. One show that I never agreed with is Ugly Betty. The show sucks and I didn’t wanna waste a half hour of my life on a show about some ugly chick.
I remember when the show first started and America Ferrera started getting some press coverage without her make up on and everyone was saying “LOOK! Ugly Betty is not ugly!” but I still think she is one of the ugliest chicks in Hollywood. I am glad the show is canceled and trust me, America Ferrera will never find work again.
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Jessica Simpson Has Gas
Jan 28th
Jessica Simpson is seriously one of the grossest humans being on the face of this earth. If she kept her mouth, and ass, shut then I could totally fuck her but she will probably never have sex with me so I will continue to bash her. During a business meeting for her new denim line she let out a vicious fart which prompted her mother who was also present to scream out “Jessica!”
She talks about farting all the time and even went on the view to discuss her dogs dingleberries with the whole world watching. What she fails to realize is that men like to pretend women do not poop or fart. If a woman wants to fart, she needs to dig a whole approximately 10 feet deep, bury herself in the whole and even then try her best to make the fart as least smelly as possible. Also, women shouldn’t poop. When a girl is born and the doctor cries out “it’s a girl!” then the doctor should immediately stitch the asshole shut.
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