Archive for August, 2009
Jessica Alba Does the Bikini Thing
Aug 3rd
There are a lot of pictures of Jessica Alba frolicking on the beach with her douche bag boyfriend, or husband, who cares, Cash Warren. But these are the best ones. It is a shame she isn’t giving us a skintight undercarriage shot like she has in the past, but I will definitely settle for these.
Some people on Monday “get a case of the Mondays” but these definitely perked me right up stronger than a double shot of espresso. I just hope this Cash guy is appreciative of the piece of ass he has managed to pull in. If I were dating Jessica Alba, I would kneel down in front of a crucifix every night and cry and pray and thank God at least two dozen times a night. And then when Jessica would enter the room and ask me what I was doing I would turn to her, still on my knees, and wave my arms up and down and say “I’m not worthy! I’m not worthy!”
Photo cred: Splash News
Links that prefer a nude beach
Jessica Simpson is drunk. Yay!- IDLYITW
Jordan has a new slut- Allie Is Wired
Jennifer Love Hewitt is dumpy- Drunken Stepfather
Katy Perry bikini pictures- yeeeah
Cute college girl of the day- College Humor
Miranda Kerr is in a bikini too- IDLYITW
Ali Larter is Off the Market
Aug 3rd
Not that this is actually big news, but Ali Larter, the actress on the show Heroesthat isn’t Hayden Panettiere got married over the weekend. She married her long time boyfriend Hayes MacArthur in a ceremony in Kennebunkport, Maine. You see I do not understand this. A couple of days ago we saw Ali bending over and getting a nice shot of her ass and I thought to myself “now that is a good girl to hit it and quit it” but this douche decides to marry her making the rest of the guys out there look like assholes if they don’t marry the first thing they fuck.
I have to say, this is not a sound investment. Ali is 33 years old and isn’t getting any younger. So he has about 7 years. If he is lucky 10 that he will be able to show up at a red carpet event and show off his trophy wife. Cause God knows, that face is gonna be sagging soon. There is always plastic surgery but that is always a roll of the dice. Of course this girl will be gone and all but forgotten when Heroes gets cancelled or ends in a few years. Color me unmarried.
