Fatback Media

Ashlee Simpson has kind of a hectic life. She spends almost all of her time locked inside her house with her kid while Pete Wentz travels all over the place partying. With a piece of ass like Ashlee at home, you really have to question his sexuality. If Ashlee Simpson were in my house, you couldn’t get me out of there with a stick of dynamite.

Anyway, a couple of nights ago Ashlee was seen at a club and apparently she was pretty drunk. She was cluching on to a bodyguard and a friend to keep her balance as she moved into the V.I.P. area. Witnesses also commented that she has lost a lot of weight since giving birth six months ago. The thing is, the witnesses made it sound like a bad thing. Chick loses baby fat and gets back to her original hot weight and people critisize her?

Also, they made it seem as though her being drunk and unable to walk was a bad thing. It is not. She stays at home 90% of the time with her kid, if she wants to have onenight out and get shit faced, then let her have some fun. I personally am gonna get into a V.I.P. room one of these days, and when Ashlee Simpson stumbles in and Pete Wentz is in the bathroom somewhere making out with some guy, I am gonna make my move. First seduce her with a cosmopolitan. Then a roofie in her bud light. We will exit from the back door like most celebrities do, and then I will make my entrance into her back door get it? Her back door? Get it?

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