Archive for May, 2009
Lisa Rinna Is Fake
May 19th
Lisa Rinna thinks she is hot shit right now because she did a spread in Playboy. That is one issue I wish I didn’t have a subscription for. Don’t get me wrong, the pubes were very neatly trimmed and rivaled that of Carmen Electra’s. But the fact that she is like 60 years old kind of turns me off. I just can’t go down on old pussy. Anyway, she told People magazine that she had the other set of lips on her body injected with silicone.
She says, ” This is the first time I have told what I have done to my lips. I had silicone put in my top lip, not my bottom lip. I was gullible enough to go and do it.” She goes on to say that eventually the silicone hardened and she got some other shit injected into her lip blah,blah. The point is, if she wants men to lust over her body, she needs to hang out at the beach topless. The paparazzi will be there. We will get our fix. I just personally never wanna see Rinna without pants on ever again. But I wouldn’t mind getting a piece of that rack.
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Cynthia Nixon Is Getting…Oh Wait, That’s Illegal
May 18th
Cynthia Nixon announced her engagement this weekend to her girlfriend Christine Marinoni. No word on who got down on one knee and popped the question. I am thinkin’ it was Christine. She looks like the male type. Of course the wedding would go over a lot more smoothly if gay marriage was legal where they lived. I guess they could go to a state where gay marriage is legal, but I don’t know if you could do that.
I am hopin’ they get hitched because everyone deserves happiness and gay marriage should be legal in every state, but until then the two will just have to hold it in. She tells Access Hollywood,” I think we would definately [ get married] if it became legal in New York.” She thinks? Isn’t that the whole point of the engagement that you are vowing you will? Either way I hope both of their cunts are happy for the rest of their lives. I am sure if they do tie the knot the cast of Sex And The City will be in attendance. Even Sarah Jessica Parker. Where no one will talk to her. And she will be alone. Crying.
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Links that had a shot gun wedding
Adam Lambert is totally straight- IDLYITW
MTV is doing a documentary on Paris Hilton- Allie Is Wired
Anna Faris does Nylon- Amy Grindhouse
Cute college girl of the day- College Humor
Lindsay who? – Celeb News Wire
I love painted bikinis- yeeeah
Megan Fox is in Elle- IDLYITW
Fergie is bisexual.Yawn. – Holy Moly
Jessica Alba is pretty- I Don’t Want Your Life
Penelope Cruz is in panties- Drunken Stepfather
Cruella Deville Ashley Olsen steps out- IBBB
Mariah carey has cans. Oh wait that’s Cannes- Celebrity Dirty Laundry
Adam Lambert is out of the closet. Sort of. – Geno’s World
Someone kissed John Mayer- Seriously? OMG! WTF?
Jordin Sparks’ new single is hot- popbytes
Mel Gibson’s girlfriend is preggers- notorious news
Miley Cyrus: Don’t Call Me Fat
May 18th
Miley Cyrus hit up the beach in the Bahamas this weekend. There is a story here but this post is basically just an excuse to post pictures of her in a bikini. After she noticed the paparazzi snapping pics of her, she took the issue to Twitter and said, ” Talk all you want. i have my flaws. im a normal girl theres thing about my body that i would change but stop calling me f*t in post. i don’t…even like the word. those remarks that you hateful people use are fighting words.”
Aww. Disney isn’t letting her use the word fat. If they are fighting words then Miley better get ready to kick some paparazzi/hater ass. She will probably just cower behind daddy’s crotch and let her parents do the fighting since she is a minor. Afterward she basically said that f*t people are beautiful and then like a schizo going through a personality changed realized she was “hating” on skinny people. She envoked Nicole Richie’s name and said she liked her figure.
So in Miley’s mind it is either morbidly obese or malnourishedly skinny. To be honest I don’t really care what Miley thinks and I have already forgotten what she said cause I am distracted by jailbait in a bikini. Now if I can just explain these pics to my parole officer when he checks my comp for contraband.
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Carrie Underwood Is Going To Perform On The Season Finale Of American Idol
May 15th
This is no surprise. Every year American Idol pulls out all the stops for the two part season finale and brings in former American Idol winners to sing the farewell ballad of the season. It has been that way since forever except for last year when they had a runner-up instead of the winner, Chris Daughtry, who sucks, sing a song called “Home”.
The song Carrie will sing is Motley Crue’s “Home Sweet Home”. I am not a fan of Underwood, but I am looking forward to her singing the line ” I had to run away high, so I wouldn’t come home low”. I like this cause Carrie doesn’t get high and I find it funny for goody goody’s to sing about drugs and getting high. Maybe she will actually “perform” this year and move around on the stage and actually do some choreography.
Yea, I know, she won’t. But I can hope for a skanky outfit can’t I? Yea, I know, she won’t. In fact the only reason I will tune into American Idol at all this year is to see one person’s dreams get crushed and see another wanna-be celeb try to make it in the music world. I am sure after Adam Lambert wins this season he will finally come out of the closet and parents worldwide will ban their kids from listening to his music. I won’t be listening either, not cause he is gay, I like gay people, it is because he sucks and he doesn’t have the balls to say “yea, I’m a homo”.
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Links that have already won
Parade of whores- IDLYITW
Hayden Panettiere and her cute little butt- Drunken Stepfather
Megan Fox is bi, then she’s straight, then she’s bi, then she’s straight- Amy Grindhouse
Are more kids on the way for TomKat?- Allie Is Wired
Jessica Biel is one tough bitch- I Don’t Want Your Life
Jennifer Hudson needs to lose some weight- yeeeah
John Mayer is smooth- IDLYITW
Angelina Jolie likes In Touch Weekly magazine- Celeb News Wire
Check out Jennifer Lopez in The Back-Up Plan - Celebrity Dirty Laundry
Cute college girl of the day- College Humor
Kerry Katona is drug free- Holy Moly
Behind the scenes of Katy Perry’s kickass new music video “Waking up in Vegas”- Geno’s World
Tori Amos’ Sinful Attraction tour- popbytes
Brooke Sheilds has curves. And wrinkles. Yea mostly wrinkles- Seriously? OMG! WTF?
TomKat will have in vitro- notorious news
